Deputy suspended after spat with officers

LARGO -- A Pinellas sheriff's deputy is serving a 15-day suspension for mouthing off to Pinellas Park police during a domestic dispute, then disregarding a lieutenant's order to leave his girlfriend's home.

Deputy Brian Bender, a 13-year Sheriff's Office veteran, began his suspension Feb. 25. The days off, which are without pay, will end Friday.

Pinellas Park police were summoned on Dec. 9 to a home where Bender's girlfriend lives. Bender, 37, owns the home, but lives at another home nearby.

A neighbor called 911 to report that Bender's girlfriend was screaming at him to stop hitting her. The screaming woke the neighbor and her husband. When police arrived, both Bender and his girlfriend denied any physical abuse.

Police learned that Bender's girlfriend had called her father in New York during the argument to say she wanted to move back there. When her father called back, he heard Bender yell at her: "If you do that, I'll shoot you."

The father was so worried that he also called police to report the threat. The couple's 15-month-old son was at the residence at the time.

Bender, who was off duty, was "intoxicated, belligerent and uncooperative" with responding officers. He called the officers "chickens---s" and insulted them because they had military-style haircuts. He also made derogatory statements about the military in general, including that "people in the military are gay," according to sheriff's records.

Pinellas Park police called an on-duty Sheriff's Office lieutenant to the scene. The lieutenant ordered Bender to leave the home and offered him a ride. Bender refused and said he would walk.

About 90 minutes later, a dispatcher called the lieutenant and told him Bender was calling her and threatening to harm himself.

Sheriff's deputies began searching for Bender and went back to the home where his girlfriend was staying. When she came to the door in a nightgown, deputies saw she had bruises on her arms and chest.

She said she was on blood-thinner medication, which made her bruise easily.

Believing Bender should be arrested for domestic battery, deputies tried to photograph his girlfriend's bruises. But she would not allow that.

Officers then found Bender sleeping in a bedroom, police said. He had disobeyed the supervisor's order.

Police decided to refer the case to the State Attorney's Office rather than arrest Bender.

"They showed a lot of patience," said Cpl. Lisa O'Mara of the Sheriff's Office, who later investigated Bender for internal affairs. "They probably showed more patience than I would have showed."

Prosecutors decided not to file charges.

Bender, who weighs 195 pounds, told investigators he drank an entire bottle of scotch that night.

Bender said he didn't remember much about the night, though internal affairs investigators say during the interview that they have trouble believing that. They suggest that Bender was having "selective memory" during their interview with him.

"Normally, in a sober state, I would not make those comments," he said.

"I would never raise my hand to a female," he also said.

Charges of insubordination and improper conduct were sustained against Bender. He faced anywhere from a seven-day suspension to termination for the offenses. An administrative review board came down the middle, recommending the 15-day suspension. Sheriff Everett Rice agreed.

Bender has been attending counseling, and a doctor recommended he be transferred from his position as a narcotics detective to road patrol.

As part of his punishment, he must complete his counseling and write a letter of apology to the Pinellas Park Police Department.

"I regret that I brought disrespect to this uniform," Bender told investigators. "I'm truly sorry this whole incident had to happen."

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