Side show

HE ALSO ISN'T CALLED THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS: "The messages start off 'Hey dude, love ya.' I get very few messages that start off with 'Hey dude.' "

That's Jennings Osborne, a wealthy Arkansas businessman, whose family Web site has gotten hundreds of messages lately intended for a better-known man with the same last name but an extra letter: Ozzy Osbourne.

The manager of the Osbornes' site, David Bazzel, tells the Associated Press he thinks fans of the heavy metal god and his TV show have a spelling problem. He says they probably forget to include the 'u' when searching for Ozzy and click on the u-less Osbornes' site without thinking.

The lack of thought apparently continues once they get to the site. It's hard to mistake The Osbornes with The Osbournes if you're coherent. The Osbornes have a version of When You Wish Upon a Star playing on their site, and to get to their guestbook, you have to scroll past a picture of an American flag light display and a picture of Jennings, his wife, Mitzi, and daughter, Breezy, posing with Mickey and Minnie Mouse.

BETTER RED: If one of your primary interests in Spider-Man is Mary Jane Watson's hair color, Garnier says non-redheads can get similar results with its Pomegranate No. 66.

I'LL TAKE CHEAP PROGRAMMING FILLER FOR $200, ALEX: How else would NBC cap off a monthlong celebration of its mostly stellar 75 years of broadcasting than by airing a program called The Most Outrageous Game Show Moments.

Granted, that will get better ratings than The Most Outrageous Huntley and Brinkley Moments, one reason being that many of you in that prime advertising demographic don't know who Huntley and Brinkley are.

The show Wednesday will be co-hosted by four legendary game show hosts -- Bob Eubanks (The Newlywed Game), Jim Lange (The Dating Game), Peter Marshall (The Hollywood Squares) and Wink Martindale (Tic-Tac-Dough) -- and one becoming-a-legend host -- Ben Stein (Win Ben Stein's Money.)

According to a press release, the special will have "comical, unscripted moments" featuring contestants on past and present shows. The highlight is promised to be a clip "never before seen" on network TV that will provide "once and for all" the truth about an urban legend surrounding an answer to a particular Newlywed Game game question.

ONE STEP FORWARD, ONE STEP BACK: Ally McBeal mercifully ends its run tonight on Fox. And if the show's five remaining viewers want to watch a current show with females who are actually competent at work, Bonnie J. Dow, author of Prime-Time Feminism: Television, Media Culture, and the Women's Movement Since 1970, has these suggestions:

Providence, Judging Amy and Crossing Jordan.

She also suggested Philly. Which was then canceled.

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