Corporate ads: Attack of the drones

TRIGAUX E-mail: Click here Archive

© St. Petersburg Times
published May 31, 2002

Brace yourself for a new smorgasbord of area corporate advertising awash in pithy phrases and feel-good imagery. Wachovia Corp., the banking giant we still know in Florida under its old "First Union" name, this week kicked off its first ads as a merged company, starting with a pitch aimed at corporate clients. Related ads hit the Florida market in November.

The campaign's snappy theme? Uncommon wisdom -- suggesting, I assume, that any wisdom in the banking industry is in short supply. One ad features a picture of a nasty storm and asks: "What can a thunderstorm teach us about leadership?" The ad's answer: "When you arrive, people take notice."

But Floridians burned by too many bank mergers and bank fees might choose another response, like: "Smart consumers learn to run from lightning."

Before we gauge Wachovia's wisdom, Verizon already is trying to tell us it's cutting edge in an ad campaign built around this line: "Make progress every day." That replaces Verizon's murkier ad theme: "How to get life done."

Among the lighter ads, the latest from Tampa's Outback Steakhouse chain shows a woman putting a scary-looking casserole in the refrigerator. After she tells her husband about her "special salmon loaf" for dinner, he secretly unplugs the fridge. Next family stop: dinner at Outback, with the voiceover: "You'll find any excuse to go Outback."

Last but not least, Tampa ad agency WestWayne this month helped team up client Denny's restaurants (still eager to add some distance from its '90s problems when black customers said they were ignored) with Jim Henson's Muppets. The new ad campaign promotes the chain's "Grand Slam" breakfast.

All competent. All predictable. What if we mixed the ads? What if staid Wachovia suddenly chose Muppet puppets as bankers? What if some Aussie-sounding voiceover promised an "Uncommon wisdom" breakfast at Denny's? What if Verizon came across as a bully in its role as Tampa Bay's monopoly provider of residential phone service: "If you don't like our service, let's go out back."

The possibilities are endless, and sometimes more true to life.

Got a good -- no, a great -- example to share of terrific customer service? Here's one. I recently traveled to Saddlebrook Resort near Wesley Chapel to attend a conference. In a rush, I parked, then left my keys in my locked vehicle.

To the rescue: Saddlebrook's Duane Mericle, a bell captain with a can-do attitude. He asked me what would I like to do. Call my wife for an extra key? Call AAA? Or, he said with the voice of one who sees keys locked in cars all too often, we could at least first try to unlock the vehicle.

With the aid of two Saddlebrook parking attendants, Mericle snaked a bent hanger through a small gap around one window toward an out-of-view door lock. He was visually guided from the other side of the vehicle. It was not easy, but it worked.

Professional. Courteous. Sympathetic. Efficient. And darn good at opening a locked car. That's great service. Thanks, Duane.

In these times of typically dismal service, I recently asked readers to send me their own tale of great service. I realize that's a tall order. I'm starting to receive some letters and e-mails, but I want more. And I want specifics. Who provided great service? What were the circumstances? I may want to ask you a question about your experience, so include a phone number. I'll put the best stories in a column this summer.

Send your example by e-mail to trigaux@sptimes.com or by mail to me at the St. Petersburg Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, Fla. 33731-1121. Thanks.

The boneheads who run Major League Baseball got it all wrong. Instead of contraction of weak teams, they need to think subtraction. As in getting rid of MLB puppet commissioner Bud Selig.

After targeting the Minnesota Twins last year as one of two teams to eliminate, in the economic interest of the game, Selig this week reversed himself and removed the franchise from the list of contraction candidates. Selig has said the Tampa Bay Devil Rays would be on the contraction list if the Twins were removed from it.

This is Russian roulette, Selig-style.

Funny how a save-the-Twins lawsuit against Major League Baseball and the growing likelihood that the Minnesota team will get a new baseball stadium combined to help change Selig's mind.

If Major League Baseball put half the effort it spends threatening contraction into supporting and encouraging young and smaller-market teams, the attendance-deprived game of baseball would be a lot better off. The Rays are just starting to get interesting.

Short takes

DOES MAGOO GET STOCK OPTIONS?: Here's one of my favorite quotes of the week, from a Los Angeles Times story about rising discontent among shareholders in a weak stock market. "In a bull market, you could have Mr. Magoo as CEO supported by the Seven Dwarfs as directors, and the shareholders would back them. But in a bear market, everybody is looking for a savior, and that's where the activist comes in," said Robert Chapman, who runs the activist hedge fund Chap-Cap Partners in Los Angeles. . .

SPRAWL AND CRAWL: Growth-is-good Atlanta took some lumps in this week's U.S. Census data. The average metro Atlanta commute grew 5.1 minutes in the 1990s. That's the largest increase among the nation's major metropolitan areas. Atlantans' one-way commute tops 31 minutes on average, more than commuters in Chicago, Houston and even Los Angeles. As for Tampa Bay area residents, average one-way drive times in St. Petersburg, Clearwater and Tampa all increased slightly to 23 minutes. That means Atlanta drivers spend what amounts to almost three additional days a year commuting than our local residents. . .

-- Robert Trigaux can be reached at trigaux@sptimes.com or (727) 893-8405.

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