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Grief envelops all who knew her
By WAVENEY ANN MOORE, Times Staff Writer
ST. PETERSBURG -- Over a year ago, the five female United Methodist ministers in the St. Petersburg area made a pact to meet once a month for prayer and fellowship. Four of the five met as usual last Thursday. Missing was the Rev. Barbara Odom, pastor of Lakewood United Methodist Church. She died Dec. 4, at the age of 51, less than four months after being diagnosed with a brain tumor. Her funeral is at 11 this morning at the church. Last week her friends and colleagues, the Rev. Lisa Degrenia of Allendale United Methodist Church, the Rev. Georgia Retta Gaston of Trinity United Methodist, the Rev. Terri Jones of First United Methodist of Gulfport and Jacqueline McMillan of Clearview United Methodist, sought solace in each other. "It was good for us to be together. We talked about Barbara, and it was good," the Rev. Degrenia said. Theirs is a calling that requires they comfort even as they grieve. "Pastors are very human and so we, of course, will miss Barbara. We loved Barbara," the Rev. Degrenia said. "Three of us were at Lakewood when the news came. ... Being with the folks of Lakewood was very healing for us, to hear people pray, to hear people share their memories. What helps a pastor to continue pastoring when they are themselves hurt is the realization that the job that we do is far bigger than a human being can handle. ... It is rooted in Christ's strength." Those who knew the Rev. Odom speak of a woman of unfaltering faith and deep love for others. She, in turn, was beloved by her congregation. "We absolutely adored Barbara," Lakewood church member Gwendolyn Johnson said. "My family was very close to her. She was not only our pastor, she was a friend and a sister. We are most saddened beyond any explanation." Mrs. Johnson and her husband, Gordon, got to know the Rev. Odom in 1997, when she was serving as associate pastor at Trinity. "She had been, even through her illness, concerned with everybody else first," Mrs. Johnson said. "Her concern was always for the other guy, and she carried that in her daily life all the time." As they planned her funeral Thursday, the pastor's husband, Donald R. Odom Sr., and eldest child, Donita Odom Moody, 30, paused to talk about the woman who also was a wife, mother and grandmother. "My mother was very, very proud of her children," said Mrs. Moody, her voice hoarse with grief and barely audible. "That's all she talked about, was how proud she was of us," added Mrs. Moody, a fifth grade teacher at Academy Prep. Another daughter, Barbara Asha, 23, graduated from the University of Florida a year ago and in recent months returned home to help care for her ailing mother. Donald Jr., who is 21, is a senior at the University of Florida. To Myiah and Sherie Moody, 2 and 5 years old, respectively, the Lakewood pastor was simply "Grammy." The Odoms had been married for 32 years. "We were high school sweethearts right here at Gibbs High School in St. Petersburg," said her husband, an attorney for Hillsborough County. "We grew up together practically. She was a wonderful wife and a support for me. She supported me all the way through law school." When she decided to change careers, from banking and social services, and become an ordained minister, it was his turn to be supportive, he said. The Rev. Odom first served at Lakewood, at 5995 Dr. M.L. King (Ninth) St. S, in 1993, when she was appointed associate pastor. From there she went to Trinity and returned to Lakewood as pastor in 1999. "It is a diverse church and she was able to relate to all people, all races, all ages, all income levels," her husband said. "They all loved her and she loved them." Frederic Hudson, head of the church's staff pastor parish relations committee, said the Rev. Odom's faith was strong. "Always, the faith was there. We were pretty much in contact until about two weeks ago. I could tell at that point that she was getting weaker. She was such a lovely person. ... I wish I had known her longer," Hudson said. The Rev. Odom fell ill on Aug. 18 and learned that she had a brain tumor. Two days later, about 200 people, members of her church, other United Methodist ministers and people of other faiths gathered for a prayer service hastily organized by the Rev. Kevin M. James, superintendent for the St. Petersburg District of the United Methodist Church, and church secretary Carol Barker. "She was a good friend and my spiritual leader," Mrs. Barker said. "She was a friend of me and my family and my daughter, who wanted her to perform her wedding. She's seen my youngest grow up, and I did a lot of things with her." It was Mrs. Barker who several years ago picked the Rev. Odom to play the role of Mary in the church's drive-through nativity. The Rev. Odom laughed at the thought of playing a girl but good-naturedly carried through. This year's pageant will go on as planned, from 6 to 8 p.m. Saturday and Sunday. "We are dedicating the whole drive-through in her memory," Mrs. Barker said. "Barbara would want us to continue reaching out to the community and carrying out the ministry and mission of the church," district superintendent James said. "If we did less, then we would be letting her down." For a while, James and other ministers will share duties at Lakewood. "We will not seek to assign another minister at this time, of course," he said. An interim pastor will not be appointed until March. A full-time pastor will be named in June, when the denomination usually announces its annual reassignments, James said.
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