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Magic formula
By GINA VIVINETTO, Times Pop Music Critic
"American Idol' returns with a bang as the elements that made it a hit the first time around are back in full force. The premiere Tuesday of the next round of the "reality TV" program American Idol proved that bad pop music makes sensational television. The program, the first of two this week dedicated to documenting the nationwide search for America's next singing sensation, also demonstrated through a variety of hideous singers, hilarious hissy fits and haranguing judges that the devil surely finds work for Idol hands to do. Fox television's hit show began its second season by using the same formula that coaxed 40-million viewers into watching its final episode last year, the one that made a "star" of winner Kelly Clarkson. That formula? it's all in the judges. American Idol has struck gold with its three purveyors of pop, the tell-it-like-it-is snobby Brit Simon Cowell, has been pop tart Paula Abdul and "industry veteran" Randy Jackson. The trio is a troika of trash talk with Abdul and Cowell handling the duties of good cop/bad cop, respectively, and witless Jackson nabbing the role similar to that of Flavor Flav, the goofy member of hip hop act Public Enemy who pretty much echoed everything said by lead rapper Chuck D. Call us when Jackson has something insightful to say. Idol's formula also relies on its contestants, both catty and charming. Like the most popular daytime talk shows, Idol features some real interesting characters. Tuesday's premiere included a guy in a wizard outfit, several foul-mouthed losers and Edgar, a sadly disillusioned auditioner in Miami. Certainly, disastrously untalented singers, like grisly train wrecks or auto accidents, are compelling to observe. Ever listen to a karaoke singer tanking big time? You can't turn away, can you? Much of Idol's first round, which began with 50,000 would-be stars, eventually whittled down to the 32 finalists the audience will get to know weekly, was filled with atrocities. So much so, Tuesday's show begged the question: Did these folks audition out of spite? Some of Tuesday's singers seemed as if they intended to inspire jaw drops and guffaws. Or at least, to inspire Cowell to launch one of his famous tirades, instigating the sort of clever contestant-judge banter we've grown to expect from Idol. Take for instance, the spurned New Yorker dissed by Cowell early in the show. "You know what?" he said, "At least I'm from a country where people brush their teeth twice a day." And so set the tone for the rest of the show. Many contestants seemed like those Jerry Springer folk, the ones who scream their heads off in what sounds like prepared rants against anyone daring to insult them on national television. To which we say: Hey, you asked for it! Perhaps Idol in its first season was about finding a new singing sensation. Cowell's new celebrity -- some of his more scathing criticisms have become pop culture idiom -- now interferes with the process. How many auditioners began their showcases by acknowledging Cowell's curmudgeonly ways? Some even groveled. As Cowell would say, "Pa-the-tic." A suggestion for a boobie prize: "I was lambasted by Simon Cowell and all I got was this lousy T-shirt." Early in the show, one young man in New York, sporting an earring in his brow and pants ripped down the side, hollered at Cowell. "You're horrible!" Well, the kid's singing was horrible, too. That's beside the point with Idol, at least early in the process, when the show is more about capturing on film the sniveling, the humiliation, and every so often, the joy of young people with stars in their eyes. It captures, too, the desperation of people -- wannabe stars, judges, people who resemble those Springer guests. People who sell their humanity for fifteen minutes of fame, just enough time to whisper, "Notice me."
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