Side show

Sometimes it's better to evaluate awards show fashion and grooming after a cooling-off period. The initial revulsion of the moment can give way hours later to the realization that, for example, Lara Flynn Boyle's Golden Globes tutu was really brilliant social commentary. Most often, it doesn't. However, we'll take revulsion any time over how Sunday's Grammys left us: waiting for someone to snap us out of the slumber induced by the preponderance of Gap chic and the constant playing of Norah Jones' Don't Know Why.

Some things we caught while our eyes were open:

TIE HER UP, TIE HER DOWN: Debbie Harry's frontier bondage queen ensemble unfortunately didn't make it onto CBS's broadcast. If it had, the only person who would have gotten more sartorial attention would have been . . .

EVERYBODY'S CRAZY 'BOUT A SHARP-DRESSED . . . UM: . . . Harvey Fierstein in his Edna Turnblad evening wear from Broadway's Hairspray. If he has some free time, he should donate it as wardrobe consultant to . . .

SHE'S IN THERE SOMEWHERE: . . . Aretha Franklin (with Jones), who buried a perfectly nice evening dress under enough taffeta to outfit a small high school prom.

ROCKER GIRL DO: Gwen Stefani of No Doubt.

ROCKER GIRL DON'T: Avril Lavigne. The goal is never to look like a reject from Alice in Wonderland. Or a Tom Petty look-alike contest.

AT LEAST YOU CAN SEE HOW WELL THE BOTOX IS WORKING: Sheryl Crow's ripoff of Jennifer Lopez's 2002 Oscar nightmare hair escapes ridicule because it provided one of the ceremony's high points: Crow had "No war" written on her guitar strap, but the "no" was obscured by the hair flopping over her left shoulder.

MOST CHIC OF THE GAP CHIC: John Mayer, because his T-shirt was orange. Trust us.

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