Joy of reunion; pain of distance

Parents notice change in returning troops

After weeks of fighting in Iraq, all Kathy and Gary Dreyer knew about their 20-year-old son came from news reports, e-mail and a brief mention of the Marine in a news story.

Then Kathy Dreyer's phone rang two weeks ago in Safety Harbor. It was her son, Marine Cpl. Cory Dreyer, calling for the first time since the war started.

He's coming home, he told his mother.

"You just burst into tears," Kathy Dreyer said. "It's just such a relief that he's getting out of there."

For some military families, President Bush's declaration that major combat in Iraq is over comes after their own, more personal marker of war's end: their sons and daughters are headed home.

Two ground units that saw combat in Iraq, the Army's 82nd Airborne Division and the Marine's 24th Expeditionary Unit, are among the first to be returning home.

The date that soldiers will reach home isn't set. The 24th Marine Expeditionary Unit is expected back around Memorial Day weekend; 1,200 members of the 82nd are expected home by mid May. Soldiers from other units are sending letters home talking about a summer return.

Troops will undergo a health assessment from medical personnel and blood tests within a month of returning, the Department of Defense announced this week. The assessment is new, a response to pressure from Congress about Gulf War Syndrome fears.

Some troops returning from the Persian Gulf War suffered headaches, memory loss, rashes, balance problems and loss of motor skills. The cause of Gulf War Syndrome is unknown.

The military also will check soldiers' mental health.

As recently as the Persian Gulf War, service members' mental health was checked before and after deployments, but little was done during combat. In 1994, each branch of the military created combat stress programs to help soldiers deal with the pressures of combat while on the battlefield.

Now there are specific units that train soldiers to identify and deal with combat stress. Treatment can range from rest to therapy away from combat.

How troops deal with the war after they're home depends on the individual and the environment they return to, said John Ward, a licensed clinical psychologist and tenured associate professor in the Louis de la Parte Florida Mental Health Institute at the University of South Florida.

All fighting men and women who come back have questions and concerns, he said.

" "How are people going to accept me?' " Ward said. "That's paramount in their mind. "How can I relax and how are people going to accept me?'

"Anyone who goes through this will be changed in some way," Ward said.

Families should be accepting of their loved one, and they shouldn't pry if their son or daughter doesn't want to talk. But "for some people, talking about it will be what they want to do."

Kathy Dreyer is just ready for her son to be home.

Her son's unit saw combat in Kut and Nasiriyah. From talking to him for a few minutes, Dreyer said, she can tell her son has changed. He's much quieter now and talks seriously about going to college.

Cory Dreyer is now onboard a ship heading to North Carolina. Kathy Dreyer knows that the Marine Corps is helping ease the transition from war to home.

"These guys can't just walk out of a war zone and turn it off," Dreyer said. "A lot of the moms are worried about that."

Even with her son home, Dreyer said, she won't stop worrying for other mothers' sons.

"I don't believe the war is over," she said. "There's a lot going on over there. It's still going on. There's still things happening.

"I'm just fortunate that (Cory is) one of the first coming home."

- Information from Times wires was used in this report.

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