Age. Let's say you're 65, but you are more confident, smarter and poised than you were at 45.
Physical ability. Though you might not be as active as before, you still feel vibrant and useful.
Mental acumen. You still make good decisions, and you do a good job of handling your business.
Now, is old age inevitable?
Your answer might depend on when you think life begins or ends.
Mattie Lee Cooksey Gardner of St. Petersburg has seen a lot of living. During a birthday celebration this month, Mrs. Gardner recited from memory a poem titled A Psalm of Life by Henry Wadsworth Longfellow. The significance? Mrs. Gardner is 101 and has recall that is sharp and focused, a steady handshake and a delightful sense of humor. (Read a few of Mrs. Gardner's thoughts on aging, Page 6)
The cover story on pianist Lillette Jenkins-Wisner, who says seniors must have a passion for living, and your letters in Sound Off that stress the importance of staying active and living in the moment, reflect a universal thought: Aging, in part, is a state of mind.
I also spoke with Rick Iannello, co-producer and writer of It's An Age Thing!, a 13-part series airing Tuesdays on WUSF-Ch. 16. Iannello, 53, is executive director of Albany Guardian Society in Albany, N.Y., a foundation that undertakes projects to improve the quality of life for seniors. The series focuses on the positive aspects of aging and how seniors cope and maintain quality lifestyles.
Is old age inevitable?
That depends on whom you ask.
Times: When we talk about aging or getting older, what does aging mean? What is old?
Iannello: The definition of aging continues to evolve. When the Social Security Act was created, 65 was considered elderly because people didn't live long.
The terms "aging" and "old" are different today.
We can be 70 or 80 and not feel old, and that's comforting. We are recognizing that there are things we can do to allow us to age well.
We can't escape the calendar. The outcome is inevitable. But just because we're older doesn't mean our older years can't be fulfilling.
Times: What are key components to successful aging?
Iannello: People who age well are individuals who enrich their bodies and minds. They are engaged in life and their surroundings; they belong to things, i.e. organizations, churches, families. They have support structures around them, family, friends and other people.
Another way to look at it is, what is unsuccessful aging?
Failing to recognize that the brain is a muscle that needs to be exercised; being isolated; not exercising; and poor nutritional habits.
It's important for us to understand that we can adopt these behaviors and increase the hope of (aging well).
Times: What opportunities should seniors take advantage of to help them manage aging successfully?
Iannello: The opportunities are all around us. We have the ability to engage in activities at churches, local senior-citizen centers, area agencies on aging, our colleges and universities, and through our volunteer organizations.
All of these are opportunities for us to get involved and to be useful, to ourselves and to others.
You must learn, plan, act and do. You must do it.
Times: If you had to cite a few major concerns among seniors, what would those be?
Iannello: Clearly that depends on who's answering that question.
What are health and social planners worried about?
Baby boomers coming to advanced ages and the types of services they will require. Will society be prepared to deal with that group.
What do seniors worry about?
They worry about if they will be infirm. Will they be able to take care of themselves. Will they be able to live in their home. Their ability to live independently. Will there be people around them.
These are concerns we all have. The concerns are real, but we don't need to become paralyzed by them. We need to move forward.
If I'm a community planner, we must try to make our community more aging prepared. Are we prepared to do a better job of dealing with our seniors?
Times: When a person's quality of life has been compromised by physical or mental impairments or even financial losses, what should/can a person do?
Iannello: The concept of quality of life is managed in our heads.
As we become older and our bodies change, we must understand that we can keep ourselves in good physical condition and we can keep our minds engaged even if we don't have the same abilities as 15 years ago.
What's important is to find those things that you are capable of doing. Revisit your capabilities. That's what seniors have always done.
It doesn't mean you're settling for less. Our quality of life doesn't have to be compromised. Redefine what is good for you.
Times: Everyone wants to be empowered to do something, but why do seniors need empowerment?
Iannello: Because we're all going to be living longer. There will be more of us. We need to understand how to make the most of these years. We owe it to ourselves to understand and use those resources available to us. We must have knowledge, involvement and awareness. These things will help up make the right choices.
Times: Why the need for the series It's An Age Thing!?
Iannello: We need the series because there needs to be a positive representation of aging that reflects the everyday average person. We're not interested in reflecting the seniors who are Olympic athletes. . . . They don't represent most people in their 70s, 80s or 90s. We want to look at everyday people.
We want the series to reflect seniors who lead good lives and who make good decisions about difficult subjects.
We want a positive representation of the average senior. We want to show that, generally speaking, seniors have always made good decisions and we want to encourage other people to do that. So when baby boomers say to themselves "How will we age?", they should look to seniors as role models and look to themselves for motivation.
It's easy to put a negative image on aging, but generally speaking, most seniors do make good choices and decisions, and have been doing this all their lives. That's the part we often don't give them credit for.
Dating redux
After last month's cover story on dating, several readers suggested that I think about starting a dating service for seniors. Some suggested I use the St. Petersburg Times' resources to weed out the bad prospects. It's an interesting idea, but I'll have to pass. I'm sure all of you will do fine without my help. Witness Bill Byrd, who got seven inquiries from his letter. Way to go, Mr. Byrd.
Correction
In a letter we printed last month on the subject of dating, Dolores Stilson of Port Richey described her experience. Because of editing errors, we gave the wrong number of years she had been single. It was 33. Also, she provided some financial support to the man she married and later divorced. We mischaracterized the type of support.
- Sheila Reed, Seniority editor, can be reached at 727 893-8452 or toll-free 1-800-333-7505, ext. 8452. Write to her in care of the St. Petersburg Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, FL 33731; or send e-mail to sreed@sptimes.com
On TV
It's An Age Thing! airs at noon on WUSF-Ch. 16. The series continues today with "Staying Active," then these episodes: "Grandparents Raising Grandchildren"; "Senior Housing"; "Remaining Independent in Your Own Home;" "Multiple Generations Living Together;" "Retirement Communities;" "Education for Life;" "Food for Thought;" "Nursing Homes" and "The Future of Aging."
