'Disabilities': a word with focus on abilities

	Theresa Linnert, left, taken on her first visit to Alexandra Hollander’s home.

Today's Xpressions theme was suggested by Marian Winters, director of Programs for Very Special Arts of Florida, in Tampa.

To learn more, contact VSA at 813 558-5095 or visit its Web site at www.vsafl.org

My mom has a disability called muscular dystrophy. She suffers with it every day. She has to walk with a cane. The muscles in her neck, legs and arms are weak. She holds onto me when we are walking into a store. MD also affects her eyesight. Every night she has to put ointment on her eyes, or she could go blind. She has to watch her step because she can trip over things very easily. When she eats, she has to eat slowly because she often chokes.

My mom wishes that she could still play sports. She may have a disability, but she's strong. She is able to take care of my sister and me every day. I wish it could be me instead of her, because she doesn't deserve it. I still love her; she's my mom.

- Natasha Bereson, 13, eighth grade, Palm Harbor Middle School

I have a learning disability, and most people don't know that except my parents and friends. Everyone has some kind of disability, but they don't know they do. Don't feel bad for people with disabilities; it's not a bad thing. It is something you are born with and it's unique.

I have a hard time understanding directions when my teacher explains things. I have trouble with spelling sometimes. I get help, and I work very hard.

I am excited about going to high school. I want to take driver's ed. I hope to go to Pinellas Technical Education Center and study cosmetology.

- Malarie Bellantoni, 14, eighth grade, Palm Harbor Middle School

If you're the average person, you've met at least one person with a disability. My Girl Scout leader has been disabled for about 15 years. Even though she's in a wheelchair, she's an average person. She once told me that some people wouldn't give her the time of day just because of her disability. What makes people think that those with disabilities are any different from "normal" people, if that's what you want to call them? Imagine someone ignoring you because of your hair color, or something like that. The next time you meet someone disabled, look past their situation and treat them like the person they are. - Stefanie Morin, 14, ninth grade, Pinellas Park High

There are many ways to make friends and many different kinds of friends to make. I learned this from a young girl named Alexandra.

My church sponsors a program where members complete cards stating prayer concerns for children in their lives. Other members randomly select a card and make a commitment to pray for that child. I selected a card for Alexandra, a 10-year-old who has cerebral palsy. Her mother's prayer was for her daughter to have opportunities and one true friend. I knew right then and there that Alexandra and I would become friends.

I wrote a letter to Alexandra and her family, telling them that I had selected their prayer card. I asked them if it was possible for me to visit and get to know her. I really wanted to become her friend. They called me, and we scheduled our first visit. The following week I met Alexandra, her mom and her little brother, Daniel. I soon realized how sweet Alexandra is, and how much fun it is to be with her.

I continue to go to Alexandra's house every week. I've learned how she communicates with everyone: Using an interactive computer, she can choose what she wants to do or play. She can let others know how she is feeling, if she is hungry or thirsty, ask to be with a certain person, or ask for help, all with the push of a button. I realized that even though she may not be able to talk, she can understand what is being said to her and respond in her own way.

Each visit I let Alexandra choose what to do. Sometimes we go on walks around her neighborhood. I push Alexandra in her chair, and we enjoy the fresh air. Other days we play board games. Believe it or not, Alexandra's computer allows her to roll dice and spin spinners by simply pushing a button. I always have fun playing board games with her, but somehow she always wins! When Alexandra is hungry, I get to feed her a snack. This can be a challenge, but I really enjoy it.

On some of our visits there is a teacher or caretaker at the house. When a teacher is there, I sometimes get to see the beautiful arts and crafts that Alexandra makes. Her caretaker assists with getting Alexandra ready for school and sometimes makes her dinner.

To this day I look forward to our weekly visits. It brightens my day to see Alexandra. She always has a cheerful smile on her beautiful face. Yes, we are very different from each other, but I've learned that it really doesn't matter in a true friendship. I feel very blessed that Alexandra is part of my life.

-- Xpress Team member Theresa Linnert, 13, seventh grade, Westlake Christian School, Palm Harbor

My brother was born with cerebral palsy. It is a disability that affects the way he learns, communicates, walks and sees, yet he always seems to be happy with himself and his life. He never complains about his problems, as people without disabilities do. That is only one of the valuable lessons he has taught me: Be happy with yourself, no matter what. Enjoy life, even when things go wrong.

- Kristin Jones, 11, sixth grade, Seminole Middle School

From seventh-grade students at Joseph Carwise Middle School in Palm Harbor:

Jonathan is a very special friend. I have never seen him without a smile on his face or a happy thing to say. When Jonathan visits, we always do something fun, as he has endless energy. No one would ever know from this description that Jonathan has Down's syndrome.

Being around him makes me feel lucky and thankful for what God has given me. Jonathan never complains about his disability - he lives his life to the fullest. He is like every other kid: He competes on a swim team and is an incredible bowler. When it comes to being a good sport, Jonathan could teach me a lesson or two. I used to think that having a disability meant to have a disadvantage, but Jonathan has changed my mind. As he says in his own words: "I just want to be accepted for who I am and judged for my abilities, not for my disability."

- Jessica Ferguson, 12

I've grown up with a friend whose sister is autistic. It's difficult for her family because it's impossible to live without thinking about how everyday things will affect them. For example, her sister doesn't like the rain falling on her, so they can't go anywhere when it's raining or looks like it might rain.

Their mom has dedicated her life to helping her disabled daughter. She never used to be able to talk or read, but with the help of her mother, she now writes and can even read and multiply. She doesn't talk much, but she can communicate if she wants something.

Whenever my friend and I play together, we try to include her sister in the games. Sometimes she plays, but mostly she just sits and watches. I think having a disability might feel like you are trapped inside your body.

- Julia Pappacoda, 13

People may have hidden medical problems. Most aren't as bad as my neck and back problem. It started when I got hit in the head with a door last year. I have been diagnosed with scoliosis, a rotated disk and hip. About a year ago I was in physical therapy. That helped somewhat. Then I went to a chiropractor. That helped, but it was too costly.

People don't understand the pain I go through every day. It bothers me when other kids complain about a slight headache. I get migraines every day, but I am determined that I can get through my days like everyone else. I know I can do it!

- Valerie Narr, 12

The dictionary defines disability as incapacity. Even though I have never had any disabled friends, I have a cousin with a disability. Patrick was born with barely any bone in his right leg. He has undergone several lengthy surgeries. Doctors have now used bone from his pelvis to replace some of the missing bone in his leg. I believe that it must take a lot of courage to try to live life normally with a disability. I imagine it must be hard, but I see people every day who try to do whatever they can the best they can. So maybe it's not so bad to have a disability as long as you have the courage to handle it.

- Dan Brothwell, 12

When I think of a disability, I don't always think of someone who is in a wheelchair or someone who is deaf or blind. People can have all kinds of disabilities that we just don't really notice until we actually think about it. For instance, my brother and dad both wear glasses, and I think that is a disability. I wear braces to make my teeth straight, and that is one of many possible disabilities.

I feel really sorry for those who have a disability that they can't control or cure, like someone who is deaf or blind or maybe both, like Helen Keller. I recently read a book about Helen Keller, and I think it is amazing and inspiring. I admire people with disabilities and how they accomplish the tasks of everyday life.

- Kelly Johnson, 13

Here's the rest of today's Xpress