A Tampa lawyer and confessed cynic says he found "instant synergy" through cyberspace with a teacher from Cape Coral.
By AMY SCHERZER
Published August 15, 2003
PALMA CEIA PARK - "You've got mail."
Ron Christaldi and Shannon Dobson still thrill at the trill of those three little words.
"If you told me two people would be in love from first e-mail, I would have said, "Not possible,"' said Christaldi. "But this was truly love from the first connection."
The Tampa lawyer may have seemed an unlikely prospect for online dating. But two years ago, Christaldi's longtime relationship abruptly ended, just 10 days before the wedding. He tried to move on, but the bar scene held no interest. Blind dates went nowhere.
Ironically, it was his ex-fiancee who suggested he try love@aol.com
"At least it's efficient," said Christaldi, 32, a confessed workaholic who specializes in business and health care law with de la Parte & Gilbert. Scanning women's biographies online let him screen out incompatibilities. One sounded interesting, but the first date nixed that fix.
He clicked on Elsewhere in Florida. "One last search," he told himself. "I thought maybe there'd be someone there from Clearwater or Brandon," he said.
Shannon Dobson's bio, titled "Through the Looking Glass," blew him away. He felt a kindred spirit immediately. The Cape Coral schoolteacher was a vegetarian, loved children, adored cats and admired the works of Lewis Carroll.
"Almost uncanny how similar we were," he said.
Christaldi sent off an e-mail expressing his amazement. Her response revealed even more common interests.
Both graduated from small Florida colleges (Shannon from Flagler; Ron from New College). Both name Steinbeck and Faulkner as favorite authors. Both consider themselves liberals, collect Fleetwood Mac and Tori Amos CDs, and claim Florence, Italy, as their favorite place.
"There were so many things that I was afraid he'd think I was making stuff up," said Dobson, 24, who then taught at the elementary school she attended as a kid. Her former principal was now her boss.
Dobson's parents, Kathy and Pat Dobson, divorced when she was in high school. Her father, an advance scout for the San Francisco Giants who pitched in the World Series twice, has remarried. Her mother had made friends through love@aol.com and urged Dobson to give it a try.
"My mom hounded me to do it because she met some really wonderful people," said Dobson.
After more than a week of constant e-mails, Christaldi and Dobson exchanged telephone numbers.
"The first call lasted five hours," Dobson said.
Christaldi's instincts told him to pursue the relationship in person. Business obligations told him otherwise. He was scheduled at out-of-state conferences for the next three weekends. A weeknight date in Cape Coral was nearly impossible for a man who works 12-hour days.
Could e-mail and the telephone fuel the fire for a month?
Law partner David de la Parte offered his sage advice: Invite her to the convention.
It was Wednesday by the time he got the courage to ask her to meet him in Savannah, Ga., on Friday.
Dobson needed time to think. "I was floored," she said. "This just wasn't my nature. I'm very methodical, very organized, but it felt right. My heart said, "Go."'
The spontaneous invitation was certainly out of character for Christaldi. The Philadelphia native, raised in New Jersey, is a meticulous planner. In fifth grade, he decided on a law career. At Florida State University, he figured out he could earn a master's and law degree simultaneously. His full calendar includes Youth Environmental Services board meetings (he's chairman), Leadership Tampa 2003 sessions and visits with his parents, Mario and Annamarie Christaldi of Sarasota.
Dobson called right back. She'd meet him in Savannah.
The hotel reservations were simple, but Dobson's airline ticket brought sticker shock. Coach seats were sold out. Her first-class ticket cost Christaldi $1,000.
"Money well spent," he says now, wincing at the memory.
He met his future wife at the Savannah airport with a dozen red roses.
"I made sure to be the last one off of the plane," said the blue-eyed blonde. "I was shaking I was so nervous."
He was equally apprehensive but had an overwhelming feeling of certainty.
"I'm a skeptic/cynic by nature, by training. I see all the potential bad outcomes," he said, "but there was instant synergy."
By the time she arrived, most of the restaurants had closed. The couple ordered Domino's pizza and drank champagne in the Marriott lobby.
"It's not about looks, it's about energy," said Dobson. "I was shaking, and he knew the right things to do."
Through the whirlwind weekend, Christaldi's colleagues told him he seemed to be glowing.
Except for the two weeks that followed, the pair haven't been apart a single weekend. Since June 2001, Dobson has taught fourth grade at Dale Mabry Elementary.
Christaldi's proposal was just as impetuous as the first date.
"One random Tuesday night in May," he recalled, "Shannon's plans to meet a girlfriend for dinner were canceled." She called him to meet her instead, before they went to the Tampa airport to pick up her grandparents.
"She always said she wanted to be surprised," he said. "And then she could tell her family."
He grabbed the ring he had bought a month before and called her mother on the way to Caffe Paradiso. Casually, between bites of caprese, he asked her to marry him.
Mr. and Mrs. Christaldi were too busy hosting their June 14 wedding at the Italian Club in Ybor City to eat dinner. Many hours later, remembering the night they met, they ordered Domino's pizza and drank champagne in the lobby of the Tampa Marriott Waterside.
The newlyweds flew to Seattle for a honeymoon cruise to Alaska on the SS Amsterdam.
- To pass along tips to Amy Scherzer, reach her at 226-3332 or scherzer@sptimes.com
