After serious consideration, we hope you'll agree the funny pages just got funnier.
By JOHN BARRY
Published August 24, 2003
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You're not going to believe this, but in some places people get, as Snuffy Smith would say, "tetched in the haid" when a newspaper tinkers with the comic strips.
Even the teensiest changes somehow incite otherwise peace-loving readers to visit Home Depot's Torch, Tar & Feather Department. Consequently, the newspaper's comics czar is usually a "shifless skonk" whose loss would be, well, easily managed.
Asked how to change the comics pages and live to tell about it, the Chicago Tribune's comics czar, Geoff Brown, could only weakly offer: "When you're called an idiot or clown . . . be a principled idiot or clown."
But a Chicago guy might not be aware that you, the good people of Tampa Bay, are Super Bowl champions who pound the rock. You welcome adventure and change. And besides, you've been clamoring for more comics for years. When Oprah visited Tampa Bay, some people got religion. But when we auditionedRose Is Rose earlier this year, some folks thought they'd died and gone to heaven.
"Rose Is Rose is AWESOME!" wrote Tona K. Bell. "If Rose Is Rose and FoxTrot were added to the Times, we would become subscribers in a St. Pete second!" wrote Jack and Nora Hampson. Get Fuzzy fans almost outdid telemarketers; they tried everything except calling us at dinnertime. "Please, please, please Get Fuzzy!" begged a "A Cat Owner in Clearwater," who likes "sarcastic pets."
As comics czars like to say, "So it is written. So it will be done."
Effective today, we are adding these nine new comic strips to the Sunday Comics section: Rose Is Rose, Zits, Get Fuzzy, FoxTrot, Luann, Baby Blues, The Boondocks, Pearls Before Swine and Non Sequitur.
Starting Monday, we will add all those new strips, PLUS Bizarro, to the daily comics pages. (To make them all fit, we're putting some on an extra page in Floridian. Also, In the Bleachers will now appear in the Sports section, and a weekly Bizarro strip will appear in the Thursday Weekend section.) That's almost a 50 percent increase, and it makes us the kahuna of comics in Tampa Bay. You may now cancel all your other subscriptions. So it is written. So it will be done, etc., etc.
Here's another comics czar decree: All your old favorites will continue to appear, except for two, which, sadly, were in critical care on our readership surveys. I'm not going to tell you which two right here. I'll slip them in later in the story. Be sure to read every word.
For now, celebrate! Be joyous!
All changes were instituted under "Rules To Live By If You're Going To Change Your Comics Lineup" (Really, there's such a thing!) compiled by the American Association of Sunday and Feature Editors.
Rule No. 1 states: "Don't go it alone. Create a committee to cover your behind." Given a mandate for change, our committee met many, many times in the wee hours, at many, many restaurants and cocktail bars in Rio, Paris and Rome.
There we developed what "Rules To Live By" defines as our "philosophy of change."
To wit: Many, many readers have begged for new comics over the years. We wanted to give a shot to talented new comics stars - the future Al Capps and Walt Kellys.
But we didn't want to kill our golden geese. So we studied our readership surveys and found out what's hot and what's not. We learned that women love For Better Or For Worse, and many younger men love Marvin. Folks over 44 love Blondie and Pickles; folks under 44 love Garfield and Dilbert. Men 45 and older also pick among their top 10 favorites Hagar the Horrible, Dilbert and Doonesbury; women under 45 choose Family Circus, Marmaduke and Cathy.
We learned that there are certain strips you just don't mess with.
"We joke that killing Family Circus is like signing our death warrant," says Susan Hegger, comics czar at the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.
"We dropped Hi & Lois 15 years ago and I'm still getting calls," says Elizabeth Mcintyre, comics czar at the Cleveland Plain Dealer.
Then, beginning early this year, we auditioned about a dozen new comic strips in Floridian and invited readers' opinions.
Hundreds of folks wrote letters or e-mailed. Charles N. Moore of Clearwater tempted the comics czar with an annual payment of "$3 to $5" to addB.C., Wizard of Id, or Beetle Bailey. Marilynn deChant wrote that "First, Zits is a big NO, Stone Soup is a big NO (both are ugly also), Baby Blues is cute and a good possibility and Get Fuzzy is a NO . . . not only weird but kinda creepy-ugly."
Marilynn confided to the comics czar that "lest you think I am a middle-aged crabby person, I am not. . . . I am a middle-aged thinking person who knows about comics."
So last week I called her to get her verdict on our new lineup.
"I would give you a B-plus," she said. "Baby Blues is adorable and Zits I can live with."
(Another reader, Fred A. Dude of Pinellas Park, graded a bunch of other strips. He gave Family Circus a B, Marvin a C, Cathy a W, and In the Bleachers an N. Fred has his own grading system.)
Yes, Marilynn admits, comics readers are tough graders.
"Our lives are so complex," she said. "But comics are just three frames and so easy to address. They help us keep our finger on the pulse of pop culture, when you don't exactly want to jump in, but you want to put your big toe in."
That's very nice, but all reader Kristie Kindstrom cares about is the bottom line: "I want to read Get Fuzzy on a daily basis. Take Get Fuzzy away from my 12-year-old nephew and he's gonna get mad."
So finally, we made decisions on each strip. Was it funny, moving, or insightful? Was it a fresh idea? A good fit?
On comics czar Geoff Brown's office wall, he keeps a panel of a vintage Smilin' Jack comic, the famous old adventure strip created by Zack Mosely in 1933. That strip is long gone from the Chicago Tribune, but "if we never dropped strips, we wouldn't have strips that people love now."
Let's take a break. Let's clear our minds of comics for just a minute, and fondly look back on another happy time, in 2000, when Dick Cheney accepted George W. Bush's invitation to be his vice president.
"Well, this is obviously a very special moment for Lynne and me. Three months ago, when Gov. Bush asked me to head up his search team, I honestly did not expect that I would be standing here today. Governor, I'm honored and proud to join your team, and I enthusiastically accept the challenge, for this reason: I believe you have the vision and the courage to be a great president, and I want to do absolutely everything I can to make certain that happens. When the governor first asked whether or not I would consider being a candidate I respectfully declined. I was deeply involved in running a business, enjoying private life, and I certainly wasn't looking to return to public service. But I had an experience that changed my mind this spring. As I worked alongside Gov. Bush, I heard him talk about his unique vision for our party and for our nation. I saw his sincerity. (Snuffy Smith and Gasoline Alley will no longer appearin our comics pages. - Times comics czar) I watched him make decisions, always firm and always fair, and in the end, I learned how persuasive he can be. So this morning when the governor called and asked me to join him as the vice presidential nominee, I accepted with enthusiasm and with an eagerness to get to work."
Okay, now we welcome your reactions. I would love to receive your letters and e-mails. I would love to hear from those who are thrilled by our new comics pages and want to tell the comics czar how smart he is. I would also love to hear from those who are not so thrilled, so I can help you embrace change and suggest some helpful yoga exercises.
I would personally prefer that you write or e-mail. I'm presently breathing through a hole in my trachea after jumping in front of a runaway bus to save 30 kindergarteners in a crosswalk. My doctor thinks I shouldn't take any stressful calls for, say, the next 35 years.
Or how about this? Wait a few weeks to give the new cartoonists a chance. Then let me know.
- You can write to deputy Floridian editor John Barry at the St. Petersburg Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, FL 33731, or e-mail jbarry@sptimes.com Phone 727 892-2258. You can reach the Floridian office at (727) 893-8221 or (800) 333-7505, ext. 8221.
New Sunday color comics:
Zits
Get Fuzzy
FoxTrot
Luann
Baby Blues
The Boondocks
Pearls Before Swine
Rose Is Rose
Non Sequitur
New daily color comics:
Zits
Get Fuzzy
FoxTrot
Rose Is Rose
Pearls Before Swine
Bizarro
Non Sequitur
Baby Blues
New daily black and white comics:
Luann
The Boondocks
Daily comics moving to the TV page, and from color to black and white:
Cathy
Shoe
Hagar
Peanuts
Hi & Lois
Comics moving to other sections of the Times:
In the Bleachers moves to Sports
Bizarro also will appear in Thursday's Weekend section
Comics that no longer will appear in the Times:
Snuffy Smith
Gasoline Alley
* * *
Other changes to accommodate the new comics:
THE CROSSWORD: The crossword puzzle formerly on the daily TV page in Floridian now will appear Monday through Saturday on Page 2D.
ASTROLOGY: Formerly on the TV page, it now appears on Page 2D Monday through Saturday and 2F on Sunday.
TV PAGE HIGHLIGHTS: The Monday through Saturday television grid will list six hours of prime time programming, from 7 p.m. through 1 a.m. The Sunday TV Times continues to provide 24-hour programming and highlights.
