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Tap water jokes.
When high-end waiters nudge "Will you have bottled water or St. Petersburg's finest?" I take the latter, Clearwater's and Tampa's too, and save $3 or more on my bill. My preference is when a restaurant fills and chills old wine bottles with tap water and leaves them on the table. Tampa's Spartaco goes one better using hand-painted bottles fill with the elixir of local waterworks. Fine by me.