It's almost time for Halloween, when we dress our sons like devils and our dogs like angels and take them out into traffic.
Makes you want to write a poem, doesn't it?
Normally we discourage people from sending us their poetry, because - well, you'd have to see their submissions to understand why. Let's just say encouraging them would only encourage them.
But some occasions - and certainly Halloween is one - can be described best in doggerel. Like this:
Vampire got his sharp fangs
Graveyard got its boo
All I got's this jack o' lantern
Drippin' yellow goo.
Here's a treat for the little sweeties
A case of Type 2 diabetes.
Here's your chance, poets, to enter Floridian's First (But Probably Not Annual, We'll Let You Know Next Year) Halloween Poetry Contest.
To enter, send us a poem no longer than four lines on a Halloween theme. The poems should rhyme, more or less. They should be clever. They should be irreverent. (Some of you, we know, will make them sweet and nice, which is fine. We need scrap paper.)
Send poems by regular mail to WHAT RHYMES WITH PUMPKIN?, Floridian, St. Petersburg Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, FL 33731. Or by e-mail to email@example.com Please include What Rhymes With Pumpkin? in the subject line. Send the poems as text messages only. No attachments!
This is important: Tell us your name, phone number and the city in which you live. The deadline for submissions is Oct. 21.
We'll publish the best submissions on Halloween. The contest winners will receive some kind of prize. We'll look around the office and see what we have. Whatever it is, we may ask you to come dressed as SpongeBob SquarePants to pick it up.