ROGER MILLSCenter John Wade is in his first year with the Bucs and already made news because of his sweaty butt. Here he is on Al Bundy, mopeds, sweating body parts, by any means necessary, rap music and cologne.
RM: Why do your teammates call you Al Bundy?
JW: Who told you that?
RM: Doesn't matter. Why?
JW: I have no idea. . . . Okay, maybe, just maybe, it's because I sit with my hands down my pants for a while. . . . It comes up here and there. I won't deny they call me that. Do I look like Al Bundy?
RM: I hear you're well known for keeping your hands down your pants.
JW: I can't confirm or deny that. Maybe it's a subconscious thing. If they say so, it might be true.
RM: You ride a moped?
JW: Two scooters.
RM: Now, John, the image of an offensive lineman in the NFL riding around a scooter in Cheval is hard to picture.
JW: I came from Jacksonville where I was always on the beach and I got two scooters. Hey, the speed limit on A1A is only 35 so it was perfect. I would go home, park the car and take the scooter everywhere I went. It was great. I never had to worry about parking and stuff like that. . . . I moved into Cheval and realized, heck, I can use it around the neighborhood. I can get out there on Luke Lake Fern Road and get busy. So I'm confined to Cheval.
RM: But how do you fit on that thing?
JW: I guess I look like Dumb and Dumber. I'm sure it looks weird, but I don't have any pictures of it.
RM: But you tell your teammates that they're Hogs. They're not Hogs, they're scooters.
JW: They're my Hogs.
RM: Tell me about changing your pants during the game because of your sweat.
JW: I started that here. Brad likes to stay dry. You know him, he changes every quarter and obviously I can't change quarterly. Truth is I don't know how much it helps. As soon as I put the new pants on they're soaking wet anyway, before I even stop running. But if it helps him, then I have no problem with it.
RM: So he came to you and asked you to change?
JW: I think he asked me if I had ever done it before. I said, "No, I have never thought about it." Subtle hint. He asked me if I would mind trying it, and he said if it was a problem, not to worry about it.
RM: You're a sweat machine.
JW: My wife can only stay near me in bed for so long. She says, "I've got to roll over." It's hot (here in Florida). I guess my core temperature is hot. I don't know.
RM: You have the biggest head on the team?
JW: You've been talking to Cornell (Green) haven't you?
RM: I'm not giving out any names.
JW: I only wear a 71/2 on a fitted hat. I don't know what my helmet is. It's probably an XL. I guess that's big.
RM: The word is that it was your head hitting the Colts' Mike Doss that caused the fumble, not your outstretched hand.
JW: I know for sure you've been talking to Cornell. I'm going to deny that. I saw the picture, the hand was right there. I'm not buying that.
RM: Some people are ear models, eye models, feet models. What part of your body would be good for modeling? Remember, this is a family newspaper.
JW: Wow. I'm going to have to say my hands. I don't know what I would model. I'm not going to paint my nails. My hands aren't too bad.
RM: What part of your body would not make the cut.
JW: The rest of it.
RM: Tell me one question you would like answered.
JW: I would like to know what's going on inside the CIA, FBI, military intelligence, all that stuff. I would like to talk to high ranking inside people and asking them stuff like, "What happened with (President John F.) Kennedy? What really happened, not what was told to the public?" It would be nice to know that stuff.
RM: Who's the first TV personality you thought was really hot?
JW: You remember the girl in The Fall Guy. What was that girl's name? I forgot her name. That girl. She comes to mind. I think it's Locklear. Heather Locklear. That's her. (Actually, it was Heather Thomas.) I'm going to get in trouble with my wife, she's going to be on me.
RM: Tell me a lie you told your parents when you were a kid.
JW: I once told them I was going to the movies.
RM: Where did you go?
JW: It's a family newspaper.
RM: Malcolm X said, "By any means necessary!" Do you agree with that general philosophy?
JW: I do. The first thing that came to my mind when you said those words was protecting this country, given the events of Sept. 11, by any means necessary. To enjoy the freedoms that we do, people have to realize by any means necessary and they have to take those words seriously. When people want to protest, that's their right, but to enjoy your life and freedom today it comes with (a price), by any means necessary.
RM: Can a team go unbeaten today in the NFL?
JW: Yes, it could happen. But will it? I'm not so sure. The Vikings were 15-1 one year, I was 14-2 in 1999 (with Jacksonville). Now, with free agency and salary cap the way it is, it creates so much parity. You would have to get on a serious roll for 17 weeks straight, have no injuries, have a lot of luck and a lot of good performances. I would never say never, but it would very tough.
RM: When football is over . . . ?
JW: My dad is a car dealer (Lincoln Mercury, Isuzu). He owns his own store that he built from the ground up, and that's what I'm going to do. I'm going to take over his business and let him enjoy his much needed retirement. I was going to do it after college, but I've had a little bit of an NFL detour. . . . Then I want to travel with the wife and then have a few kids. For now, I've had to learn to think for two, so to think for three is a big responsibility. I want to be totally ready.
RM: You hate country music and like rap music?
JW: Yeah, no country music. I can't stand country music. But I like rap music. I've got some Doctor Dre right now in the CD player. I told you I could put it on you. The other day Roman Oben was going through my music and he asked me, "What are you doing with this." I like that stuff, here and there.
RM: Do you use cologne?
JW: No. I'm not a cologne guy. I had a bottle of cologne that somebody gave me as a freshman in college and I had it for 41/2 years. The same bottle. It was probably half way down. I used it twice in 41/2 years and the rest were for my friends.
RM: Doesn't your wife (Natalie) want to splash you with a little something from time to time?
JW: I think she tried that once. But we're past that now. She knows I'm an Old Spice fresh scent guy. She could smell the fresh scent. That's all I've got for her.