Oh what fun it is to write as gov'ment has its way!
By HOWARD TROXLER
Published December 24, 2003
JEB BUSH WE HAVE HEARD ON HIGH
Jeb Bush we have heard on high
No high-speed rail, that vote's denied
Overrule the Schiavo case
Smaller classes? That's a waste.
Je-eh-eh-eh-eh, Je-eh-eh-eh-eh,
Je-eh-eh, eh-eh, Je-eh-eb!
He knows more than you do
Je-eh-eh-eh-eh, Je-eh-eh-eh-eh,
Je-eh-eh, eh-eh, Je-eh-eb!
He knows more than you-u-doo.
UP ON THE STATE PLANES
Up on the state planes, quick, quick, quick,
Johnnie Byrd and Jim King stick
Taxpayers with travel bills
While they draw down the public till.
Ho! Ho! Ho! Who wouldn't go?
Ho! Ho! Ho! Who wouldn't go?
Law-mak-ers are a special class,
And taxpayers can kiss their rears.
PHONE COMP'NY WONDERLAND
Give big cash to politic-ians,
Write the laws for which we're wishin',
We can get 'em all passed
Without battin' a lash
Walking in phone comp'ny wonderland.
Last year was the first we got our law through
Jeb vetoed that bill, which made us frown
"Won't you help us now there's no election?"
"Of course," he says, "I'll sign
this time around."
P-S-Ceeee-'s a joke, of course so,
Rammed the ra-ates right through
and more so,
Now the future is here
Twenty per-cent a year,
Walkin' in phone comp'ny wonderland.
GOOD KING RICK
Good King Rick looked out one day
And set once more to scheming:
"What we need's another deal
"For our small town's redeeming."
Boat race, car race, tall ship stunt
Cruise ships and pep rallies
For fear his burg might be forgot
By folks at Rand Mc-Nal-al-ly.
THE TWELVE DAYS OF CITY COUNCIL
On the twelfth day of City Council
The members gave to me,
Twelve towering condos,
Eleven county squabbles,
Ten Baywalk protests,
Nine-and-forty votes for chairman,
Eight members mumbling,
Seven salaams to the mayor,
Six soliloquies by Jay Lasita,
Five John Bryan schemes!
Four nearly indecipherable
referendum questions,
Three French computerized parking meters,
Two daily sold-out, 1,000-passenger gambling
cruises, starting any day now, honest
And a partridge, subject to the restrictions
of City Code 29-24, subsection (B).
SILENT BUCS
Silent Bucs, no-playoff Bucs,
Should've scored
But the offense (was weak).
Five-yard passes with
no pro-tec-tion,
Kick cov'rage that let
op-pon-ents run,
Flags and de-fens-ive collapses,
To kick field goals they now need a map.
O, LITTLE DESALINATION PLANT
O, little de-sal-in-a-tion plant
How thick thy filters clog
With mussels and such bay debris
That makes your output bog.
A hundred-sixty million bucks
Perhaps it could be worse
But shouldn't they have dipped a jar
To test the water first?
DECK THE YARDS
Deck the yards with TECO's eyesores!
Ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha, ha, ha
Hurt their re-sale prices and more!
Ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha, ha, ha
Do it with-out any warning,
Ha ha ha, ha ha ha, ha, ha, ha!
With pretty words our scheme adorning
Ha ha ha ha ha, ha ha, ha, HA!
[Last modified December 24, 2003, 01:16:08]
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Howard Troxler: Oh what fun it is to write as gov'ment has its way!
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