In jail for killing a teacher, the 17-year-old has earned his diploma and is praying that God forgives his sins.
By Associated Press
Published February 9, 2004
MIAMI - Nathaniel Brazill has adjusted his expectations to fit within the prison bars that will hold him for many more years.
The teen convicted of second-degree murder for shooting English teacher Barry Grunow with a .25-caliber handgun in a Lake Worth Middle School hallway in May 2000 is trying to follow a straight path.
Brazill says he's focusing on religion and education as he serves a 28-year sentence for Grunow's slaying.
"I accept my circumstances," Brazill, 17, told the Miami Herald in his first interview from prison. "I just hope I can do something worthwhile in here."
Before he shot Grunow, Brazill was a smart and playful student who dreamed of rescuing the world from evil forces. He wrote to the U.S. president to say he wanted to join the Secret Service. And he took a gun from a family friend, so he could learn to shoot and prepare for a life of protecting people.
Instead, the then-13-year-old turned the gun on Grunow when the teacher refused to let Brazill talk with two girls in his classroom.
Brazill told police that he didn't mean to do it and apologized for the act during his trial. But, for now, he has nothing more to say.
"I can't. I just can't go there," he said.
Brazill's father, Nate Brazill, who visits his son every month at Hillsborough Correctional Institution near Tampa, said the teen has repressed the incident.
"It's just too painful for him to face. He has to hold himself together to keep going in prison," he said.
So Nathaniel Brazill focuses instead on God and his future. He formed a gospel choir, which performs in the prison chapel every Sunday, and moved to a faith-based dormitory that includes 16 Christian, Muslim and Jewish inmates ages 14-20.
Brazill earned his high school diploma at 16, scoring a superior rating. He has completed a plumbing course and has enrolled in courses for electricians and legal research. He works in the prison's law library and helps other inmates write briefs.
"When I get out down the road, I'm going to ask to have my civil rights restored so I can become a criminal defense attorney and help people," he said.
Brazill reads the Bible for an hour before the 5 a.m. roll call and does dozens of push-ups before the exercise hour. He seldom shows vulnerability, guards said.
"I have associates, not friends, and it's better not to show what's inside or get too close to them," Brazill said.
Janet Shumway, who has volunteered as a mentor to Brazill for 31/2 years, said she worries about the "terrible burden" Brazill hasn't yet faced.
"He needs professional help to deal with what he did, and I know he's not getting it," she said.
When Brazill prays aloud with the Shumways, he always concludes, "God, please forgive my sins."
