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Let me apologize if you thought this column would give you respite from all the Stanley Cup hoopla. Turns out, some of my punk-rock girlfriends and I got caught up in it, too.
Weird, huh?
We're not normally into sports. And we make no secret of that.
Yet, as two of us watched the last 40 seconds of the big game Monday in my living room, we were screaming, freaking out that "our boys" were going to win this thing.
Weeks ago, I didn't even know the basics of the Stanley Cup playoffs. I didn't know that the Tampa Bay Lightning had to win four games in the final to win. Someone from the St. Petersburg Times Sports department explained that to me at a Beef "O' Brady's during Game 1. I was there to hang out with a friend while she watched the game. I'm not sure I'd even been inside a sports bar until that night.
I didn't watch all the Stanley Cup final. I tuned in here and there, and I kept up with the headlines.
I did notice, however, that several of my friends were doing the same. Several of my weirdo friends.
I'm talking about the chicks with fuchsia hair and tattoos. Girls with piercings. My friends who, along with me, usually mock sports and sports fans, and call anyone with Bucs banners a Neanderthal and anyone with pompoms a bimbo.
Not that we're judgmental. We're too evolved for that.
Suddenly, we ceased mocking our co-workers, boyfriends and brothers. Why?
Because hockey is totally cool.
As my hairdresser trimmed and bleached my hair last week, we gabbed about the sport.
It's punk rock, we decided. All those guys beating the mess out of one another. Then, later, skating around, acting like it was no big deal.
It's like the mosh pit at a punk show where you're just in there blowing off steam. Iggy Pop could be a hockey player.
We laughed about all the players getting stuck in the penalty box, like so many clowns in a VW at the circus.
It's the coolest sport to watch, we agreed.
The players have to have finesse and strength to skate, handle the puck and, oh, yeah, score goals. After some searching on the Internet, I found the cleverly titled Puck Rock, Vol. I & II, (Sudden Death, $16.98) by various artists, proof that punk rock and hockey, indeed, are kindred spirits.
Another piece of evidence: This month's Rolling Stone featured a picture of British goth-rocker Robert Smith of the Cure performing in a Tampa Bay Lightning jersey.
In honor of our Stanley Cup winners, let's crank up these tunes:
Ride The Lightning, Metallica. (Or any Metallica song. The Lightning guys must be big Metallica fans, or haven't you visited the team's Web site, where a Metallica medley plays behind a montage of audio highlights?)
Call Me Lightning, the Who
Bolt of Lightning, Bob Marley
Iced Lightning, RJD2
Flash Lightning, Tom Verlaine of Television
He Who Holds the Lightning Rod, Electric Hellfire Club
For those surlier moments:
(My Baby Put Me In The) Penalty Box, Boris the Sprinkler
Hit Somebody (The Hockey Song), Warren Zevon
You High Sticked My Heart, the Dinks
Lost My Teeth, the Zambonis
Blood on the Ice, the Riverdales
Our Stanley Cup, the Smugglers
Why not end the night with:
We Write the Songs That Make the Whole Rink Sing, the Zambonis
* * *MF DOOM (OR SOME VERSION THEREOF) AT THE ORPHEUM: The Tampa Bay area doesn't get too many live hip-hop performances, so one in the form of MF Doom should be interesting. Why? MF Doom could bring with him several personas, thereby giving you more for your money.
The supertalented London-born Daniel Dumille began his career by making a record with 3rd Bass (The Gas Face), then joined the militant Islamic rap group KMD and performed under the moniker Zev Love X. During the early 1990s, KMD was spreading the word about the Nation of Islam along with others in the hip-hop world such as Poor Righteous Teachers and Brand Nubian.
Eventually, Zev split with KMD, and began calling himself MF (Metal Face) Doom.
In that persona, Doom wears a mask and raps about, well, doomsday, and other paranoid visions that aren't necessarily without humor. Doom is a funny guy, but his "wit" is cutting and provocative.
Last year's Vaudeville Villain finds the restless Doom performing as a comic book-type character, Viktor Vaughan, a mild-mannered rapper who is also an evil scientist. The album's scattershot tales are held together by the seamless production of RJD2, King Honey and others.
Doom has a new album, Take Me to Your Leader. This time the MC raps under the guise of - get this - a three-headed alien king.
Who will Doom be Friday?
One thing's for sure: openers Red Tide, from Tampa, one of the best live hip-hop groups inthe United States, will get the gig started off the right way. These guys have the tunes, the attitude, the spirit and the finesse to get the crowd pumped up.
MF Doom performs with Red Tide at 9 p.m. Friday at the Orpheum, 1902 Avenida Republica de Cuba, Tampa. Admission is $15. (813) 248-9500.
BETTER ERASE THAT MIX TAPE (OR LEAVE IT OUT OF THE CAR): Researchers have found that drivers who are rocking to loud, fast music are twice as likely to get into an accident, according to Britain's RAC Foundation for Motoring. The musical culprits, however, might surprise you. The five-most dangerous songs to listen to at full volume while motoring around your city are:
(1) Wagner, The Ride of the Valkyries
(2) Prodigy, Firestarter
(3) Basement Jaxx, Red Alert
(4) Faithless, Insomnia
(5) Verdi, Dies Irae (Requiem)
Gina Vivinetto can be reached at 727 893-8565 or gina@sptimes.com