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Gay dads fight to keep custody of two sisters

Four months ago the two men gained long-term custody of two young, troubled girls. Now the state is having second thoughts.

By CURTIS KRUEGER
Published July 16, 2004

	[Times photos: Lara Cerri] Curtis Watson tries to fix the broken shoelace of one of the six children that he and his partner are raising in their Seminole home.

	Watson gives a lesson to one of his foster children. The state is considering moving two of the children elsewhere. Two top DCF officials resign

SEMINOLE - The smiling 5-year-old girl in a dripping yellow swimsuit slid open a glass door and said, "Daddy, I love you, I love you."

It wasn't clear if she was talking to one daddy or both. But the two dads - gay men who are life partners - broke into smiles.

Those smiles may soon fade for Curtis Watson, 40, who is the licensed foster parent of the 5-year-old girl and her 6-year-old sister; and for his partner, who is in his 40s and works for a health facility. They no longer are sure how long they can keep the girls in their family.

Four months ago, they were thrilled when the state granted them long-term custody of the sisters, just a step shy of adoption. Now the state says it made an error and may want to place the girls elsewhere.

"How do you explain that to (the girls), say "We made a mistake?' " asked the men's attorney, Deborah Cerminaro Eldridge. "Obviously it's in the girls' best interest to remain where they are."

Gay and lesbian adults are allowed to be foster parents in Florida, but state law bars them from adopting children.

Earlier this year, Watson says, he and his partner received a call from a caseworker with unexpected good news. The caseworker explained a legal procedure that would allow the two foster girls to stay in their home indefinitely.

"I was shocked, very wonderfully shocked," Watson said. For him, it meant "the children could be in my home, I could be their dad for the rest of their lives."

The state that officially bans gay adoptions was for all practical purposes preparing to make parents out of two gay men.

On March 18, a Pinellas-Pasco circuit judge signed an order giving Watson and his partner "long-term, nonrelative custody" of the two girls. Not a formal adoption, but the next closest thing. The order gave the two men legal and permanent custody, Eldridge said.

The two dads celebrated with the girls, posed for family pictures and sent out formal announcements.

Then the state changed its mind.

This morning, Watson and his partner are scheduled to appear in court for a trial that could determine whether they get to keep the girls they consider their daughters.

The younger girl loves to comb her hair and make sure her barrettes match her outfits. Her older sister loves horses, Britney Spears and writing letters. They enjoy watching movies and going to church.

Both girls were placed in foster care at a young age, and so was a younger sister, because officials said they suffered from abuse or neglect at home. The details of this mistreatment are not public. The state ultimately took away the parental rights of the mother and father, meaning they have no legal right to raise or even see the children.

The two older girls came to live in the home of Watson and his partner last year; one arrived in May, the other in July. As a licensed foster parent, Watson's job was to provide a temporary home for the girls, while state social workers looked for a permanent, adoptive home for them.

The local nonprofit agency that handled foster care programs in Pinellas County at the time, Family Continuity Programs, could not find someone it considered both willing and qualified to adopt.

"For a year they attempted to find an adoptive home for all three children and they were unsuccessful," said Eldridge, the attorney.

Eldridge said caseworkers concluded that keeping the two girls in the home of Watson and his partner "was a good alternative because the children had flourished" and they "were so bonded to them that it was in their best interest to remain with them permanently."

Sometimes caseworkers for the state Department of Children and Families - or for the agencies it hires - are unable to find someone willing and able to adopt children, especially kids with severe emotional and physical problems. In some of these cases, the state places children permanently with relatives, family friends or other "nonrelatives."

This arrangement is a long-term one, unlike foster care, which is nearly always supposed to be a temporary step before a permanent home is found. But the arrangement is not quite as final as adoption, because the court retains a measure of control.

Before such an arrangement becomes final, a judge must reach the conclusion that it is in the best interest of the children.

Even though state law would ban two gay men from adopting a child, three sets of state workers concluded it was in the best interest of both girls to remain with Watson and his partner. The caseworkers for Family Continuity said so; an official called a general master agreed; and Pinellas-Pasco Circuit Judge Irene Sullivan signed the final order.

The documents explaining why generally are not public, but Eldridge said the system placed the girls with her clients because "They're very loving with the children. They really provide a very stable home and they provide discipline which they need, and stability, and just a great deal of love."

Not everyone agrees this home is the best place for the girls.

Department of Children and Families spokesman Andy Ritter said DCF received a complaint about the case and reviewed Family Continuity's case file to make sure it had looked carefully at all options for finding the children a permanent home.

"All permanency options had not been properly ruled out," Ritter said, which is why DCF is taking another look at where best to place the children.

He said he didn't know how often this kind of long-term placement had been used in other situations with gay parents.

Shortly after Judge Sullivan signed the order in March granting legal custody to Watson and his partner, the two men received a letter indicating DCF wanted to reconsider. DCF wants a new foster care agency that took over from Family Continuity, the Safe Children Coalition of Pinellas, to try again to place the girls for adoption.

Eldridge said no one so far officially has objected to the fact that Watson and his partner are gay, but she suspects that's what's behind it.

"It's my position the state has no grounds to do what they are doing," Eldridge said. She said the court already has decided it's in the girls' best interest to stay where they are.

Both sides will meet in court today to argue the case, but no immediate decision is expected.

Watson lives in a 2,400-square foot house with his partner, who did not wish to be interviewed or identified for this story, for fear of reprisals because he is gay. The two said they have been together for eight years. In addition to the two girls, four other foster children live with them, and they have had several others.

Ritter said only Watson is a licensed foster parent, not his partner. But Ritter said Watson's partner underwent the same required background screening before children were placed in the home.

When Sullivan signed the order in March allowing both men to have long-term custody of the girls, Watson said, he and his partner wanted to share the news with their relatives. "It was a monumental date and event for us," he said.

So they mailed out formal announcements. Watson said, "It's just kind of our dedication to our family and friends that these are our children, and we're committed to them, in bringing them up in a positive way."

Watson said both he and his partner are hoping and praying they will be able to keep the girls in their home, rather than placing them back up for adoption.

Asked what the two girls mean to him, Watson said, "they mean love, they mean happiness, they mean worry, all the things that a parent feels. Every morning the younger one hunts me out just for a hug with her messy hair and her bad breath. That to me is the best start to the day. They mean just complete joy to me."

[Last modified July 16, 2004, 01:21:14]