The popularity of Internet dating among people 55 and over is a surprising boon to online dating sites. Business is expected to grow as boomers join in.
By Associated Press
Published October 4, 2004
Sensuous, intellectual woman, 5-foot-3, adventurous, pretty and open, seeks a life partner who is sexy, highly intelligent and cheerful.
That's the profile Mary Bellis Waller posted on two Internet dating sites during her search for a companion in recent years. Maybe not out of the ordinary, except Waller is 64.
Waller was a pioneer of online dating among people her age. Now thousands of people older than 60 are turning to the Internet to find romance. They're bringing in unexpected revenue for online dating sites, which expect business to grow as many baby boomers find themselves single again.
"You don't have to be a beauty queen or a young babe to find interesting people on the Net. People think that their romantic lives are over because of age, but it has nothing to do with it," said Waller, a psychotherapist in Milwaukee who logged onto chat rooms and then Match.com after her second husband died in 1996. She's now in a serious relationship with an executive-turned-farmer, but said she met dozens of other interesting men on the Internet.
Imatchup.com, an online dating site with 2.5-million members, said the number of its users 55 and older is rising as much as 30 percent faster than its total population. The online site will feature more seniors in ad campaigns starting this fall, according to marketing director Stephanie Schwab.
"Online dating is as popular for seniors as it is for other age groups," Match.com vice president Trish McDermott said.
In August, more than 16 percent of those active on the top five dating sites, including Yahoo Personals and Match.com, were 55 and older, and more than 5 percent were 65 and older, according to Nielsen/NetRatings Inc., an Internet research firm. That's up from 15 percent in the 55-plus category and 4.8 percent in the over-65 group from a year earlier.
Overall, the number of people active on top dating sites grew to 22.53-million in August from 22.28-million a year ago.
Observers say one of the main obstacles in online dating for people 60 and older was overcoming their technophobia, but that seems to be fading as more people use computers and the Internet. Of the nearly 148-million people active online in August, nearly 20 percent were over 55 and more than 7 percent were over 65, according to Nielsen/NetRatings.
"Seniors are the fastest-growing online demographic overall," said Kaizad Gotla, an analyst at Nielsen/NetRatings. "It has been a challenge in the past, but they are becoming more comfortable adopting to the Internet. It really has become a necessity."
Chet Bayliss, 77, whose first wife died 25 years ago, said he "learned to be Internet savvy to get on Match.com" at the encouragement of his son, who wanted him to find romance again. It took just a few weeks to learn to use e-mail and surf the Web, he said.
Finding a wife "was a kind of motivator," the Laguna Woods, Calif., resident said. He found one, meeting Janice Stromme, now 66, in May 2003. They married three months later.
"I had never thought I would get married again," Bayliss said. "I pretty much had given up."
Online dating sites could help seniors feel more comfortable by "offering more hand-holding or step-by-step assistance, and perhaps even offer coaching to help them register, use e-mail and write catchy personal ads," said Andrea Orr, author of Meeting, Mating (. . . and Cheating): Sex, Love and the New World of Online Dating.
An online video service called Attractone.com is trying to do that, launching a service for seniors that will bring Web cams into senior centers so they can meet, according to Richard Braun, founder and chief executive. The company is starting with a handful of centers - one in Washington state, and three in California - and hopes to go nationwide.
Older online daters appear to have different goals from their younger counterparts, according to a survey by Match.com. It found that 26 percent of singles age 55 and older were looking for a commitment or marriage, much lower than the 55 percent for ages 18 to 29; and 60 percent for ages 30 to 39.
Dr. Gilda Carle, a Yonkers, N.Y., psychotherapist, says online dating gives seniors "something to live for that they didn't have before. This will guarantee a greater longevity for our seniors."
"Most women who tried it didn't know any available men off line, and were surprised to see there are men out there," Orr said.
Still, there are disappointments, as there are in dating at any age.
Megan Appleton, 72, of Philadelphia, who has been separated for 20 years, said she had a date with a man she met online, but he didn't call again. She doesn't think she will try again. "I would rather play bridge with my friends," she said.
But there are many others who found love.
John Fox, 62, who got divorced in January 2001, started surfing the Web soon after. In May 2002, the Heber-Overgaard, Ariz., resident met Judi Carpenter, a recent widow, who lived five hours away in Bullhead. They married the following October.
"I dated other ladies through my church, but this was a wonderful way of meeting people," Fox said.
