Weather | Sports | Forums | Comics | Classifieds | Calendar | Movies

Love abounds in nature

Bernadette Parker treasures the memories of helping her late husband, Jerry Parker, with his work on Florida's water systems. She still has his notes - and wears his ring.

SUN CITY CENTER - Bernadette went on two dates with Garald Parker. When he proposed after the second, she gave him 10 reasons why their marriage would fail.

She was 27. He was 50. She was a devout Catholic. He was Unitarian. They ran in different social circles. He was a famed hydrogeologist. She worked as a secretary at the U.S. Geological Survey in Washington, D.C., where they met.

Almost 50 years later, she still wears the diamond engagement ring he bought a week after their first date. Even though Garald Parker died in January 2000, Bernadette keeps alive their shared passions for family and nature. And she does so with the gentle humor that carried her through personal losses and 45 years of marriage to a man with nine lives.

"I'm telling you, I went through a lot of things," Parker said.

She has proof in faded notes, photographs and letters at her Kings Point home.

Parker grew up fearless in the shadow of the nation's capitol. Her childhood was marked by long treks around parks and neighborhoods, searching for interesting rocks along the way.

By 19, she was married with two children. The marriage was miserable. Then her oldest son, Johnny, almost 5, was struck and killed by a truck outside her parents' home.

Parker peservered through faith and pride instilled by her strong mother. She went back to high school and graduated at 23. At the U.S. Geological Survey, she enjoyed working with scientists passionate about life and the earth.

She met Garald, called Jerry, at the agency's annual theater performance, where employees poked fun at their bosses. He recently had lost his wife to cancer. They clicked. Soon, he started taking coffee breaks at the same time she did, so their paths would cross.

They married in a three-way ceremony that included her son, Rob, whom Jerry later adopted. On their honeymoon - a road trip across the United States - the newlyweds packed into a car with Rob and Jerry's elderly mother. On later trips, they would have four daughters in a station wagon.

The Parkers' marriage was anything but boring. On field trips, she washed babies at camp sites. She proofed his research papers. His work took them to 15 homes in almost a half dozen states. She became an expert at throwing dinner parties on several hours' notice.

"Man your battle stations," she would warn her daughters.

Family adventures were legendary. Jerry delivered their third daughter on the kitchen floor during a Maryland blizzard. She played paramedic, driving Jerry through the Badlands after he collapsed with a heat stroke on a field trip. And she was there to care for him after he walked off a cliff angling for the perfect photograph.

Parker relished the lifestyle, which gave her a front row seat to history. Her husband promised that he would come home at 6 p.m. and put away his work for the night. More often than not, he honored that promise. Every morning, he would bring her coffee and the newspaper in bed before the children woke up.

By his side, she learned to appreciate the science and the beauty of Florida's water systems. Before their marriage, Jerry Parker wrote the definitive guide to the Florida Everglades. In 1979, they moved to Hillsborough County, where Jerry worked with the Southwest Water Management District. He later opened a business as a environmental consultant.

Today, her speech is peppered by references to aquifers and river basins. She reads the newspapers with an expert eye, and stays in touch with her husband's professional friends.

She is as passionate about protecting the environment as he was.

"Water is not a renewable resource," she said. "If we don't study history, we're doomed to repeat it. If we don't stay close to the environment, we are going to lose it."

Longtime residents of Carrollwood, the couple moved to Sun City Center 10 years ago. As she had at each of their homes over the years, Parker set up an elaborate flower garden and took meticulous notes of species planted, including a registry of their scientific names.

In the end, she was glad that Jerry did not suffer long from Alzheimer's before he died. Despite his absence and the more recent death of her son Rob, her life remains full with classes at a community church and various Kings Point activities. And her children and grandchildren call daily.

"I think that God has a plan for me," Parker said. "And it's a good one."

- Letitia Stein can be reached at 661-2443 or lstein@sptimes.com

AGE: 77.

FAMILY: Daughters Beth, 48; Carol, 46; Debbie, 44; Lisa, 41; seven grandchildren and one great-grandchild.

LEARNING FROM HER HUSBAND'S WORK: "I liked listening to shop. You learn something that way."

HER OWN WORK: Parker was an assistant to the dean of medical school admissions at the University of South Florida.

UNCREDITED WORK: Parker said that the idea of erecting a bridge between the medical school and the VA Hospital was hers.

DREAM TRIP: A 1990 road trip to California, Nevada and Colorado. Parker still has her husband's detailed notes on miles traveled per day and how long each leg took.