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SUSAN ASCHOFFWith thousands annually injuring themselves while brushing their teeth, folks' ability to safely operate a toothbrush is perhaps no longer a given.
Didn't your mother ever tell you not to run with a toothbrush?
Apparently not.
A government study found 2,489 people a year treated at hospital emergency rooms for injuries sustained while brushing their teeth.
"A majority seemed to reflect incidents where they were doing something else simultaneously," says Dr. Brockton Hefflin, a U.S. Food and Drug Administration researcher.
Such as?
"Running down the hall, tripped and fell," says Hefflin, recalling one report.
"A struggle between two people." The toothbrush jammed in one combatant's mouth.
Seriously.
The research is serious. By examining data compiled by the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission on injuries sustained while using medical devices - from hypodermics to contact lenses to pacemakers - officials hope to prevent harm.
Is the equipment faulty? Was there too little instruction on its proper use? Did the operator err?
"We've seen people knock their teeth out with (a toothbrush)," says Dr. Ferdinand Richards, an emergency room physician at Tampa General Hospital.
"I've seen people get in automobile accidents who said they were brushing their teeth."
Without water?
At least the frothing-at-the-mouth driver was using the toothbrush for its intended purpose. Some put it up their nostril, in their ear or other places never envisioned by Procter & Gamble.
Between 1999 and 2000, more than 454,000 people suffered injuries while using medical devices. Motorized scooters and wheelchairs accounted for the most: 179,631, mainly cuts, contusions and sprains in falls from the vehicle.
Results will be published in the American Journal of Preventive Medicine.
But a toothbrush? And we're talking manual here, not some battery-powered buzzsaw of a plaque buster.
Will toothbrushes need a label? Caution. Do not insert into eyes.
Instead of Spider-Man, will kids' brushes be decorated with skull and crossbones?
More words to live by for a public IQ which requires Very Hot! to be printed on McDonald's coffee cups, a defense against lawsuits by those who scald their own laps.
"I have not," Richards says, "ceased to be amazed by, um . . ."
People's stupidity?
Silence.
Lack of judgment?
Yeah, that, Richards says.
Distracted? Angry? Sleepy? Put the toothbrush down and step away from the vanity.
Susan Aschoff can be reached at 727 892-2293 or aschoff@sptimes.com