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Party checklist, times five

FIVE WAYS TO WAKE UP TAKEOUT/STORE-BOUGHT FOOD

	[Times illustrations: Rossie Newson]

* Add capers, olives or fresh herbs to salads.

* Serve takeout or frozen egg rolls with bottled peanut sauce rather than cloying duck sauce.

* Dress up bagged lettuce with toasted walnuts, dried cranberries, goat cheese and a simple vinaigrette, or sliced avocado and julienned red pepper with a citrus splash.

* Transfer several orders of chicken Pad Thai to a decorative platter, scatter lime wedges and grate carrot over the top to freshen.

* Play with frozen cheese pizza. Add another flavorful cheese, such as asiago or feta, to liven it. Sprinkle with fresh herbs or punchy olives such as Kalamata.

* Get drunk.

* Talk to one person the entire time.

* Run out of food and/or drink.

* Don't introduce guests to one another.

* Wait too long to serve food.

* For a small gathering, ask guests if they have food allergies or particularly dislike anything. For a large party, make sure you have something for vegetarians and dieters.

* Match food to situations. A sit-down meal can handle just about anything. If guests are to eat standing, don't serve soup or food that requires two hands to eat, such as steak.

* Offer cold and hot food on the buffet: dips, meatballs, quiche bites, crab puffs, simple fruit and vegetables, and small nibbles, such as olives or nuts.

* Don't put out all the food at once for a party that will last a few hours. Refill bowls and save some offerings for later.

* People always eat more of the good stuff, so make sure you have enough. Shrimp, miniquiches and hot appetizers usually go faster than cauliflower and nuts.

* Limbo

* Charades

* Truth or dare

* Spin the bottle

* Name that tune

* Celebrations 101 by Rick Rodgers (Broadway Books, $29.95). With 20 menus and 100 recipes for entertaining. Good advice: Make room for your guests by rearranging furniture so they can circulate.

* Party Central: A Month-By-Month Guide to Entertaining on the Cheap from Budget Living magazine (Penguin, $19.95). Frugal ideas for many occasions. Good advice: Rent a cotton candy or popcorn machine for a Halloween party.

* Fete Accompli!: The Ultimate Guide to Creative Entertaining by Lara Shriftman and Elizabeth Harrison (Potter, $24.50). Lots of dishy name-dropping and clever ideas from "lifestyle experts and uberpublicists." Good advice: The party doesn't have to be at your house. Consider an art gallery, a boat, a diner, a park, the beach or even a beauty salon.

* Cooking for Company by Nicole Aloni (HP Books, $19.95). More than 50 recipes and 38 menus designed by Aloni, a cooking teacher and former caterer, to get you out of the kitchen and into the party. Good advice: Serve what you make well.

* Celebrate! by Sheila Lukins (Workman, $35). More than 300 recipes and 43 menus from the legendary caterer and cookbook author. Good advice: For Thanksgiving, decorate tables with large fragrant bunches of herbs in small pitchers and soft yellow roses, cut low and full.

	Related story:
	Home, made simple Lay your table with confidence and some planning and you'll reap the pleasures of the season: making memories with loved ones and dear friends.

* "I don't cook." Get takeout or hire a caterer. Make the party a potluck.

* "It's a pain to clean the house." Start a week early, devoting about 30 minutes a night to your chores. Save bathrooms and kitchen for last. Or hire a cleaning service for the essential rooms and close off those you don't want guests to visit.

* "A party costs too much." Have a dessert get-together. Ask everyone to bring a favorite sweet, homemade or store-bought, and serve flavored coffees.

* "I want it to be perfect and don't have enough time." Stop judging yourself; others don't. With home entertaining on the decline, most guests are thrilled to get an invitation.

* "My family fights when we get together." Give people jobs to keep them from one other's throats. Invite outsiders who might put warring factions on best behavior.

* Eat some protein and relax for 15 minutes.

* Set the table or buffet.

* Deal with unruly pets. Put Fido out back and Bootsy in a closed room. Guests don't want pet hair on their clothes, and you don't want your pets to be accidentally let out.

* Put music on to make the joint inviting as soon as guests arrive. Don't let people mill in silence.

* Make sure trash cans are empty and visible.

* "Small cheer and great welcome makes a merry feast." - William Shakespeare

* "A host is like a general: it takes a mishap to reveal his genius." - Horace, Roman lyric poet

* "Beer is not a good cocktail-party drink, especially in a home where you don't know where the bathroom is." - Billy Carter, brother of former President Jimmy Carter

* "The hostess must be like the duck - calm and unruffled on the the surface, and paddling like hell underneath." - Anonymous

* "If you accept a dinner invitation, you have a moral obligation to be amusing." - Wallis Simpson, Duchess of Windsor

* Place a good-size lemon wedge on a party platter so people can plunge their discarded toothpicks into it. * Everybody loves ice cream, so serve it for dessert. Offer several flavors and lots of toppings.

* Make sure rolls are split for sandwiches so guests don't have to slice them.

* If it can't be replaced, don't use it. A big party is not the time to use family heirlooms.

* Ask (or pay) older children to keep tables and countertops clean. They can alert you when bowls are empty.

* Lots of ice

* Cream, low-fat milk, sugar and sugar substitute for coffee

* Matches for candles or to light the grill

* Salt and pepper dispensers

* Hand towels in bathrooms