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Cartoons

Maybe that's that's why they're called animated

By SUSAN ASCHOFF
Published February 4, 2005

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First it was a magnanimous kitchen sponge. Now it's a traveling rabbit. Some cartoon characters just hang with the wrong crowd.

Beloved SpongeBob SquarePants, a nerdy guy who lives in a pineapple under the sea, drew criticism from the conservative groups American Family Association and Focus on the Family for promoting acceptance of gays in a music video. Now Buster, best friend to PBS's wildly popular Arthur, an aardvark, has been denounced by Education Secretary Margaret Spellings for visiting a family with lesbian mothers in his series Postcards From Buster .

Spellings says many parents do not want their children exposed to a lesbian lifestyle. The episode with the moms, scheduled Wednesday, was pulled from 350 PBS stations, reports the New York Times .

And on the Simpsons, producers say one of the show's characters will come out and be married by Homer. The wedding will be televised Feb. 20. A leading contender would be Patty Bouvier, the chain-smoking, raspy-voiced sister of Marge who has rarely dated men. One Web betting site, PaddyPower.com, stopped taking wagers because so much money was placed on her.

SpongeBob drew the ire of some conservative Christians when he joined Barney, Winnie the Pooh, Bob the Builder and other children's characters in a video for schools urging acceptance of different creeds, races and religions produced by a group seen as pro-gay on its Web site.

The characters SpongeBob and Buster are gentle souls who get caught in goofy predicaments or wrestle with life's complications. SpongeBob holds hands with his best friend, Patrick. Buster has asthma and is a child of divorce. Children empathize with them.

Critics contend they stealthily market a gay lifestyle.

But why pick on a sponge? For years, a variety of Web sites have humorously "outed" cartoon characters. Some excerpts:

* Popeye -- Eats salad, wears a sailor suit and hangs with a guy named Wimpy.

* Peppermint Patty -- Beats the Peanuts boys at every sport. Her best friend, Marcie, calls her "sir." Wears pants when all the other girls wear dresses.

* Marcie -- See previous.

* Chuckie -- In the Rugrats gang, he's the sweetest boy.

* Buttercup -- The tomboy of the Powerpuff Girls, perhaps she's just a super jock. One cannot overlook girl power.

* Waylon Smithers -- He has declared himself to his boss, Mr. Burns, on the Simpsons at least 20 times.

* Milhouse -- He's Bart Simpson's best friend; the crush on Lisa was merely adolescent confusion.

* Velma -- Big sweaters and big brains in the Scooby-Doo gang; always tries to sit next to Daphne.

* Shaggy -- He'd rather hang with Scooby than the babes.

* Hefty Smurf -- Whole Smurf village worships his biceps. There's only one girl Smurf anyway.

* Ernie -- So mild-mannered he mellows even perpetually cranky Bert on Sesame Street .

* Jughead -- He's such a romantic he can't oust the fickle Betty and Veronica because Archie likes them.

* He-Man -- Way too much time at the gym.

* Chip and Dale -- In Rescue Rangers , they're a gay take on the Thin Man 's hetero couple, Nick and Nora.

* Beavis and Butt-head -- Hateful homophobia masks their own affection.

* Bugs Bunny -- Bugs is an easy one: He kisses other male characters on the lips, stands with hand on hip, frequently dresses in drag and loves to belt out Broadway show tunes while dressed in a tux and top hat.

* Batman and Robin -- Spandex. We don't dare elaborate.

* Pink Panther -- Need we say more?

* Pointy-Haired Boss -- Dilbert's nemesis. Perhaps he's asexual. Or not human at all.

* Mickey Mouse -- Don't even try to talk to us about Minnie.

- Susan Aschoff aschoff@tampabay.com

Sources: http://wbab.com www.monster-island.org; www.keepersoflists.org; tbt* wires.

[Last modified February 2, 2005, 13:29:09]