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We have Moss, Canseco, Bonds, Chaney, but no pay checks

By JOHN ROMANO
Published February 27, 2005

Five topics suitable for inane debate on talk radio:

Missing paychecks: The list of salary-cap victims is growing every day. Carolina waives Muhsin Muhammad , New England drops Ty Law, and the NHL Players Association loses 600 salaries.

No Moss, no mas: Why would the Vikings want to trade Randy Moss to the Raiders? It's not just his petulance. And it's not simply because he takes up too much room under the salary cap. It's because he's no longer worth the hassle. You can put up with a creep if he's helping you win, but Moss ain't exactly carrying the Vikings. In the past four seasons, they are 28-36 and have only one playoff game. That's the definition of expendable.

Not-so-tough guy: Did you see where Jose Canseco dodged reporters at a book signing, and hung up on a radio interview after a tough question? I guess it's true what they say about steroid users. It really does cause shrinkage.

Calling Cooperstown: Roberto Alomar said last week he did not think he needed 3,000 hits to make it to the Hall of Fame. He may be right. Since they began giving out defensive awards in the late 1950s, only two infielders have won at least 10 Gold Gloves and compiled more than 2,700 hits. Hall of Famer Brooks Robinson is the first. Alomar is the second. And it probably will require the offense/defense argument to put Alomar over the top because, with 276 hits to go, he is something of a long shot to reach 3,000.

The new gold standard: So, after the debacle in Athens, the International Gymnastics Federation is overhauling its scoring system. A perfect 10 is still attainable, but it now requires a routine of high difficultly, a perfectly executed performance and $1,000 worth of unmarked rubles.

Five goals for Barry Bonds this spring:

5. Convince America that the camera adds 10 pounds to your head.

4. Find a media-shy mistress.

3. Cancel Hormone of the Month membership.

2. Work Gov. Schwarzenegger into every conversation.

1. Buy a cell-warming gift for Victor Conte.

1. Setting the stage: Temple coach John Chaney tells reporters he will put a "goon" in the game if officials do not call illegal screens against Saint Joseph's the following night. So forget the heat-of-the-moment defense.

2. A fateful choice: Chaney sends in little-used Nehemiah Ingram with instructions to play rough and foul hard. Ingram commits five fouls in four minutes, including one that sends Saint Joseph's John Bryant sprawling.

3. Immediate aftermath: Seeing Bryant prone on the floor for several minutes does not seem to have an impact on Chaney. When told after the game that Bryant might be injured, Chaney calls himself an "ornery, mean, SOB" and says these things happen. This is called a lack of remorse.

4. Political fallout: By the next day, Chaney realizes he's in trouble and suspends himself for one game. Later comes news that Bryant has a broken arm and will miss the rest of his senior season. Temple increases the suspension to three games. Chaney is allowed to be at practice and could be coaching in the Atlantic 10 tournament in two weeks. Possibly against Saint Joseph's.

5. Conclusion: Chaney should be, and is, ashamed. But Temple, the Atlantic 10 and the NCAA should be equally embarrassed. A three-game suspension is a travesty. Particularly when Chaney announced his intentions ahead of time, and failed to act contrite until realizing his job was on the line.

Checking out candidacies for Wednesday's Hall of Fame vote by baseball's Veterans Committee:

Gil Hodges: Highest percentage of votes for a player not in the Hall.

Tony Oliva: Three-time batting champ whose career was shortened by injuries.

Ron Santo: Nine-time All-Star and five-time Gold Glove winner.

Joe Torre: The lone player with more than 1,700 hits and 1,700 victories as a manager.

Roger Maris: Only hope is sympathy vote amid the steroid scandal.

Is Brad Johnson still here?

[Last modified February 27, 2005, 00:13:19]