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IT!

Sitting and thinking have their value

By CECILIA TUCKER
Published March 7, 2005

I saw a poster one time that said, "Sometimes, I sits and thinks and other times, I just sits." I know there appears to be a play on words in this statement and some may think it teeters on the risque. But beyond this, why did this poster speak to me? I am a teenager, and I am not always as motivated as my parents and teachers think I should be.

Adults seem to think I waste a lot of time doing nothing. I have tried being funny and telling them I am growing and that takes a lot of my time and energy. In a way, this is true: But no one wants to buy that line, especially when I sleep 12 hours each Saturday and Sunday and spend lots of time every day eating. Believe it or not, these activities take a large portion of my leisure time.

So what is my point? Sometimes, I am just sitting, but I don't see sitting as a bad thing, and here are some reasons why. I wake up tired; some would say that's because I don't get enough sleep at night, and they are right. I have trouble going to sleep at 9 p.m. because I am not tired then. I think one reason for my exhaustion is that school starts too early for teenagers; then teachers expect us to not only show up on time but to be alert and somewhat cheerful - impossible!

The first two periods of almost every school day I spend sitting, hoping that through osmosis I will retain something of what is said. I come home from school completely exhausted, and I either need to take a nap - which keeps me up later - or I need to just sit (and eat, of course). When I do these things, I get into trouble for being unmotivated and lazy.

Pay attention now because the next several reasons for sitting are not about me. I hear my parents say all the time that they need a few minutes to sit and gather their thoughts after a hard day at work. I see them hurry around the house at night so they can have some down time. I hear them say they are too tired to exercise, that they need to chill, so please leave them alone for a while.

Sometimes I watch them veg in front of the television or sit and chat on the phone while they sit. My designated down time seems to have their judgment attached to it, but I am not allowed to point out to them they are doing exactly what I am doing. I really laugh inside when they pull out the container of ice cream at 10 p.m. and try to justify why they are eating at this time of night.

Sitting and thinking or just sitting doesn't need to be limited to rainy days or Monday (the first lazy day of every work week). I think the value of just sitting has to do not only with being comfortable with oneself but with being able to be still and empty my head for whatever will fly through it next. I think if I learn now how to be still maybe I won't struggle so much trying to learn how to do that when I grow up.

I must say that as I sits and thinks, I wonder if adults lose that ability as they get older and that's why they resent us for making the time to do it.

Maybe we could all benefit from more sitting and thinking time.

- IT! Private thoughts of the Indomitable Teen is written by Cecilia Tucker under the editorial guidance of a panel of teenagers (in exchange for pizza and volunteer hours). Tucker is a licensed marriage and family therapist at the Counseling Center for New Direction in Seminole. Comments are welcome. You may write c/o: IT!, Xpress, the Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, FL 33731, or e-mail Floridian@sptimes.com If you are interested in being on the teen editorial panel, please contact Cecilia Tucker at revcecilia@msn.com

[Last modified March 4, 2005, 11:28:03]