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Cocky and humble

By ROBERT FRIEDMAN
Published March 13, 2005

We have two late-arriving bulletins from the Say Wha? update desk:

* The New Mexico Senate's Conservation Committee voted 6-2 last month to reject legislation that would have banned cockfighting in the state. The vote effectively decided the issue for at least another year, leaving New Mexico and Louisiana as the only states in the union where you can still attend an old-fashioned, legal cockfight.

As noted in the Feb. 6 installment of Say Wha?, New Mexico had been under intense pressure from Hollywood animal-rights activists led by Pamela Anderson to ban the alleged sport. But after three hours of what the Associated Press called "impassioned testimony," the Senate committee stood up to the outside agitators.

Sen. Phil Griego called the attempt to ban cockfighting a "ridiculous" waste of legislators' time. "This is what you call a rural vs. urban issue," Griego said. "You open this up, and you'll have the same people testifying that rodeos are bad, that the way we brand our cows is bad, the way we dehorn our cows is bad, the way we castrate our cows is bad. . . . To do away with cockfighting is to do away with a major portion of our heritage."

To which Ruth White of Socorro County replied: "It is part of my cultural heritage to have slaves."

Other speakers seemed less interested in defending cockfighting than in defending the honor of their state in the face of Hollywood's attacks. "We do not claim to be without faults," Luis Sevilla, an engineering student at New Mexico Tech, said of his fellow New Mexicans, "but we do claim that cockfighting is not one of them."

Which raises the disturbing question of what the people of New Mexico do consider a fault.

But the real highlight of the committee hearing came when the procockfighting forces produced a celebrity capable of neutralizing the star power Pamela Anderson had brought to the other side:

"My objection to this bill is that I feel we have enough government in our lives, enough control over us and . . . enough bureaucracy," said Wilford Brimley, the crusty actor and TV pitchman. Brimley told the Senate committee he moved to New Mexico because "the sacred rights and integrity of the individual are put to the forefront" there.

Brimley, who can fake rustic sincerity better than anyone else in show business, already has proved he can sell everything from cereal to insurance. He probably could help his adopted state sell cockfighting, too. Imagine the slogan possibilities:

Wagering on fights to the death between crazed birds with razors strapped to their legs - it's the right thing to do.

Or,

Cockfight fever - catch it! And maybe avian flu, too!

Or,

New Mexico: Where the rights are sacred and the roosters are scared.

* Meanwhile, prominent athletes are showing even more humility than they were when Say Wha? first checked on them back in December.

For example, Former Miami Dolphins quarterback Dan Marino found it "humbling" to be inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame. New York Yankee Jason Giambi said the support he has received from fans after he semiadmitted he used steroids was "humbling." Loquacious Philadelphia Eagles receiver Freddie Mitchell claimed he was taking "a humble approach" to the Super Bowl.

Two years ago, Maurice Clarett was the cocky star of Ohio State's national championship football team. But since then, Clarett was suspended from school and denied early entry into the NFL. Now he's just another struggling guy hoping to catch on with a team.

But Clarett says he's a better person now, thanks to the advice of his new lawyer, David Kenner. "In the past, I said some things I shouldn't have said, and (Kenner) taught me to be humble," Clarett said. "It was a humbling thing being humble."

Not even Clarett is as humble as long-haired, bearded Boston Red Sox centerfielder Johnny Damon, who earned the nickname "Jesus" during the Red Sox's run to the World Series last fall.

"It's incredible," Damon told Boston magazine. "What more can you ask for? Even being mentioned in the same sentence as Jesus or God . . . I mean, those guys are awesome. I'm just a knucklehead."

Robert Friedman is editor of Perspective. He can be reached at friedman@sptimes.com

[Last modified March 13, 2005, 00:23:15]