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Bucs

Gimme five

By JOHN ROMANO
Published December 25, 2005

TALK OF THE TOWN

Five topics suitable for inane debate on talk radio:

COOL HAND CHRIS: Forget the debate. Forget the old line about never losing your job while injured. Re-signing Chris Simms has to be the No. 1 priority in the offseason, even if it means asking Brian Griese to take a pay cut. Simms has three fourth-quarter comebacks in seven weeks, and it would have been four if Matt Bryant hadn't missed a field goal against Chicago.

OBLIGATORY PLAYOFF PICTURE: The Bucs are division champs if they win next week, which means a home playoff game, but they are still longshots for a bye. The Bears would have to lose both their games, including tonight at 3-11 Green Bay, for Tampa Bay to have a bye. If the Vikings lose tonight, however, the Bucs do clinch a wild card.

TOUGH LITTLE GUY: Did you see Bryant in a fight after a kickoff? I'm not sure if it was unsportsmanlike conduct or uncomprehensible conduct.

ANTIFREEZE FOR THE CADDY: Would it be so wrong to take Cadillac Williams out to the parking lot and beat the bejeebers out of him before the game? The guy does not seem to warm up until he's pummeled. He's averaging 3.4 yards a carry in the first three quarters and 5.9 in the fourth quarter and beyond.

WAAAAAH! He is a phenomenal athlete, but Michael Vick is also a crybaby. By heaving the ball into the end zone at the end of regulation, he showed up defensive teammates who had just allowed the tying score. It was just like Vick hanging up on reporters when asked about his struggles against Tampa Bay. Hey Mikey, you are 2-5 against the Bucs and have averaged 144 yards passing. Maybe if you acted more like a man, you would have a chance of beating them.

Five signs an NFL player is having a bad Christmas:

5. Listed as the fourth wise man on the Nativity depth chart.

4. Ron Mexico gives you his hand-me-down jocks.

3. Drank Michael Irvin's "spiked" egg nog.

2. Got your $%# kicked by an elf.

1. You play for the Falcons.

1. JOSH BIDWELL: If he does not make a spectacular save, the Bucs don't make it to overtime. Working as Bryant's holder, Bidwell took an errant snap and got it in position for the extra point conversion that tied the score.

2. TODD STEUSSIE: The most maligned Buc of recent years, Steussie stepped in for Kenyatta Walker at right tackle and helped produce the tying and winning drives.

3. DEXTER JACKSON: His first sack in four years took the Falcons out of field goal range early in the fourth quarter. Atlanta had to punt, the Bucs drove for a field goal and the score was tied.

4. MARK JONES: Bryant had the winning kick, Simms directed the winning drive, but it was Jones who put the Bucs in position to win. His 28-yard punt return in overtime was the difference.

5. MICHAEL PITTMAN: DeAngelo Hall appeared headed for the end zone after an interception, but Pittman ran him down from behind at the 13. The defense held, and Atlanta settled for a field goal.

Checking out the best bets for Super Bowl XL in Detroit:

1. COLTS: Hard to predict how emotions will factor in.

2. PATRIOTS: Getting healthy, and getting scary.

3. BRONCOS: Indy's vulnerability should perk things up in Denver.

4. SEAHAWKS: The most consistent team in the jayvee division.

9. BUCS: From 5 to 10 wins matches biggest turnaround in team history.

Better than anyone ever thought.

[Last modified December 24, 2005, 23:43:13]