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Word for Word

So it wasn't love, actually

Published January 17, 2006

Sally Erickson and Renzie Davidson were in love.

Their unusual prenuptial agreement said so. It also addressed almost every conceivable situation that might test their love: Renzie's clutter, Sally's cussing, his nagging, her backrub needs. With such a prenup, what could go wrong?

Everything. After just three months, the suburban Orlando couple split. Davidson, 62, reconsidered a short time later and took Erickson, 61, back. For the last four years, she thought she was the Mrs. Renzie Davidson. Come to find out, Davidson secretly divorced her more than two years ago. She's suing him for fraud.

The prenup, as it turns out, didn't have a provision for fraudulent divorce.

And before you ask, we didn't make any of this up.

- RODNEY THRASH, Times staff writer

This agreement is made and entered into, with love, this 3rd day of July, 2001, by and between Sally Ann Erickson, a resident of Altamonte Springs, Florida, and Renzie Leroy Davidson, a resident of Oviedo, Florida, who shall be collectively known herein as "the parties", or Sally and Renzie.

... Whereas, the parties are presently unmarried and intend to be married to each other within the next year and, in anticipation of such marriage, the parties desire to fix and determine various financial, emotional, and other relationships that will apply during their marriage and upon the termination of their marriage whether by death, divorce or otherwise;

Whereas, each party enters into this agreement freely and under no duress or undue influence upon his or her decision to sign.

The premises being considered, upon consideration of the mutual promises hereinafter set forth and for other good and valuable considerations, the receipt and sufficiency of which are hereby acknowledged, the parties agree as follows:

... 6. The parties will file separate income tax statements each year.

7. Sally is to pay the monthly electric, phone, and cable bills in full. Renzie is to pay Sally $35 per week for groceries. Sally will purchase the remaining groceries each week. Renzie agrees to not complain, or otherwise make a fuss, about how much Sally spends on any of the above mentioned items. In addition, Renzie does not get to complain about how cold Sally keeps the a/c temperature. Sally will be mindful of Renzie's comfort level, with both parties keeping in mind that it is more socially acceptable to put on a sweater to warm up than to take off clothes to cool off. Also, Renzie agrees not to complain, or otherwise make a fuss, about long-distance phone charges.

8. Renzie agrees to pay all other bills regarding home upkeep/maintenance including yearly property taxes.

9. Sally will be responsible for paying her own health insurance, medical and dental bills, other insurance, clothing, gifts - especially for grandchildren, and any other personal items - especially hairdresser charges. Renzie will not complain, or otherwise make a fuss, about her expenditures in these areas.

10. Sally will cook breakfast a minimum of 3 times, during the weekdays, and one time per weekend. In return, Renzie will not wake Sally up on her "off days." Sally gets to designate her "off days," as long as she complies with the specified number of days she has agreed to.

11. Renzie will rub Sally's back/neck 3 times during the weekdays, and one time per weekend for a minimum of 5 minutes, but hopefully more, each time.

12. Renzie will de-clutter or allow Sally to de-clutter his entire home to Sally's rather exacting specifications. Renzie will let Sally know which items that are special to him and which he wants to keep. Sally will respect his wishes in this regard. Renzie agrees to dispose of each room's clutter within seven days. After 7 days, Sally will dispose of the clutter in any fashion she chooses.

13. Most importantly, Sally and Renzie will be married before 8:00 p.m. on July 4, 2001.

14. Sally relinquishes any rights to a honeymoon. However, Renzie agrees to take Sally to London and Edinburgh before Sally's 60th birthday, for a minimum of 7 days. This trip will include one night spent in a castle, somewhere between London and Edinburgh, and attending one play in London, preferably "a first run show". Renzie also agrees to take Sally to the Grand Canyon for a minimum of 3 days. Renzie will not concern himself with "cost-cutting measures" for the London/Edinburgh trip, keeping in mind that London is an expensive city, period.

15. Renzie will agree to attend joint counseling sessions with Sally if they are unable to resolve their differences (with a minimum of 6 visits per issue, unless the issue is fully resolved for both parties before 6 visits are reached). The therapist is to be chosen by Sally. Both parties will equally share costs of therapy.

16. Renzie will pay the necessary fees/charges to satisfy Sally breaking her lease with Vineridge Apartments by Dec. 1, 2001, or upon such time as Renzie's house is fully de-cluttered and ready for occupancy.

17. Each time Sally should regretfully use the "F" word, she agrees to do one hour of yardwork within the next 7 days. Likewise, Renzie will put $5 in Sally's cookie jar each time he complains, nags, or otherwise makes a fuss about Sally's expenditures in the above-mentioned areas. This money will be spent at Sally's discretion.

IN WITNESS THEREOF, we each sign the foregoing Prenuptial Agreement (also known as a Premarital Agreement), do it willingly and as our free and voluntary act for the purposes herein expressed, and further state that we are each eighteen years of age or older, of sound mind, and under no constraint or undue influence.

-- Word for Word is an occasional feature excerpting passages of interest from books, magazines, Web sites and other sources. The text may be edited for space but the original spelling, grammar and punctuation are unchanged.

[Last modified January 16, 2006, 15:25:04]

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