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Fun is growing old with grace

By GEORGI DAVIS
Published June 9, 2006

I love older people. When I was younger, older meant over 40. Things have changed. Older now describes someone in their 80s or 90s.

At any rate, I love watching these people. I hope, someday, to be like most of them. They have learned to grow old graciously and with a sense of humor.

Take, for instance, my neighbors. They are in their 80s and are just super people. They sit in their lanai in the mornings and afternoons; she reads books or just chats with her husband. He loves to tell jokes to those who stop and visit while on their walks.

On Sundays they clean the house together. He is in charge of sweeping because she has a bad back. She does the lighter work. They discuss the work before they do it. They also discuss how to weed the flower garden and what they will plant.

For entertainment, they go to lunch with a friend. Each one gets a week to pick the place where they will eat. They are just as nice as can be and as cute as buttons. They don't bother anyone, and they never complain, not even with all the illnesses they have been through.

He has a degenerative eye disease; she just went through a bout of cancer. But you don't hear them go on and on about their troubles. They are just glad to be around.

Up the street live two older people who have no car and don't drive. He is legally blind. She is energetic. They walk everywhere. To the convenience store. To the grocery store.

They are always holding hands. She likes to wear things on her head to help celebrate holidays. At Christmas, she wears antlers; for Easter, bunny ears. You get the picture. At Christmas, their picture window is filled with angels and Santas. They don't complain, either, and ask nothing of their neighbors.

When my grandchildren were coming to visit, I told them we had a pool next to the house. They wanted to know if the residents swam in it, too. I told them they did, but that wouldn't ruin their fun. Then they asked if they all had walkers and canes. I told them they would have to see for themselves. They were very surprised when they saw these "older" people diving and doing cannonballs into the pool, playing Frisbee and having a great time.

To be old doesn't mean we have to act that way. In our over-55 community, we have, as most clubs do, those who do and those who don't. We have a group who will always volunteer to help put on the clubhouse functions, of which we have many. We have breakfasts, dinner dances, plays, line dancing, poker, bridge, pool, golf tournaments, horseshoes, and for those with a finer touch, quilting. There is even tennis for those ambitious enough.

I remember when the corporate office first said it was going to build the tennis courts in the new section of our community. Some skeptics wondered who would ever play on them. To my delight, they are used daily, even when it is hot.

So growing old is not just a case of sitting still. We have people who ride their bikes, go for walks and sing karaoke. One man in our community just left for Ontario - on his motorcycle. We have boaters, canoeists, fishermen and golfers. We have those who enjoy the rewards of working hard all their lives and those who would rather sit on their duffs and complain. They would rather complain than get involved and enjoy life. Nothing is ever right for them. The government isn't right, their community isn't right, even their friends are the brunt of their complaints.

At social functions you can hear them complaining that the food at the dinners isn't any good, the music is too loud, or the tables are not set correctly. All they have to talk about is how horrible it is to get old, how many medications they are taking and how many surgeries they have had.

These are some of the same people who, when asked to host a function at our clubhouse, were heard saying, "I came here to be served, not to serve." Whatever made people think that just because they are older, the world owes them a living? I certainly hope when I grow old (and I do hope I do; the alternative is not so good) that I remember what I just wrote.

Life is to be enjoyed, no matter what your condition. How many people have we seen rise above the setbacks in life and do something to help others and, in the process, help themselves?

I know there are those of you with debilitating diseases who are incapable of helping others, and this may sound like a bunch of bunk. My prayers go out to you who are no longer able to do what you used to. But it is the attitude you take to these problems that makes all the difference. As the saying goes, "Laugh and the world laughs with you. Cry and you cry alone."

So who out there is going to be a senior, and who is going to be a senior citizen? Maybe it's time to think about what you really want out of life. It's easy to sit and complain. It's more fun to be active and enjoy what you have.

Living will not give up on you until you give up on living.

Georgi Davis lives in Homosassa. Guest columnists write their own views on subjects they choose, which do not necessarily reflect the opinions of this newspaper.

[Last modified June 9, 2006, 06:51:59]