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Don't fear change, says author who knows it well

You can learn to welcome inevitable, life-altering events, even traumatic ones, her book says.

By SHERYL KAY
Published October 13, 2006

TEMPLE TERRACE - Change can be a constant.

Ask Afsaneh Noori. In 52 years, the Temple Terrace consultant had ridden so many waves of transformation, she decided to write a book about change, and how to cope.

Thus began another chapter of her life in the spring, when Scheherazade Publishing released Change Thrivers - Your Resource Guide for Making Change Work.

"It's been fast and its been furious, and there's been a lot of it," said Noori, a former industrial engineer and business consultant living in Temple Terrace. "Change has really been the theme of my life, and the person that came out of each change was so different than the person who began it."

Born into a privileged Muslim family in Iran during the leadership of Shah Mohammad Reza Pahlavi, Noori grew up relatively worry free until she fell in love with a man of another religion.

To keep the lovers apart, Noori's parents spirited her away to the United States, a country Noori knew little about other than from Hollywood and books. She was 20, a college student. She had to start from scratch.

"The language was different, the culture was different, and the nuances were all different," she said.

Within a few short years of her arrival, the shah's government fell to radicals led by the Ayatollah Khomeini. Thinking that one day they would return to Iran, Noori's parents had left behind many extended family members, their home, belongings and financial assets. Several relatives were executed.

It was an enormously hard time for Noori's family and it left her more determined to succeed at the American way of life. Although she was not enamored of engineering, she reasoned that it was a male-dominated field and would command respect.

"I bought into the American dream," she said, "but I had lost myself."

She wasn't comfortable in the Eastern world of her birth, nor in the West.

Continuing unsettledness brought persistent turmoil. Noori married three times, each union ending in a distressing divorce.

Perhaps the most shattering change happened in 1999, when her brother died of a heart attack. The two had been extremely close.

"It really pulled the rug from under me," Noori said.

She recognized that with each tumultuous change, she had slightly better coping skills. She was better able to care for herself emotionally and physically.

"With every change in her life I've watched her reassess her life - a rebirth of sorts," said Patricia James, 60, a longtime friend and business associate. "I've watched her journal, and heal and grow."

Noori had always wanted to write a book. So when she took a class through the National Speakers Association and was given an assignment to "create a product," she fell back on her personal experiences as well as a few workbooks she had penned as an organizational development specialist. The resulting manuscript was the basis for Change Thrivers.

"She definitely is a woman on a mission," James said. "She has experienced a life filled with the unexpected, and is using it to help others."

While she wrote Change Thrivers primarily for women, Noori said change is ubiquitous, and anyone can find relevant answers in the book. Searching for one's inner power, building a strong support system, and recognizing that perception is reality are all themes that speak to a wide audience.

"You may not choose change, but the truth is, change chooses us," Noori said. "Children do grow up, so there is an empty-nest syndrome. Unexpected deaths occur. You will retire. Change will happen, and with that change there is always saying goodbye to what is, and there is also saying hello to what will be."

For more information about Change Thrivers, go to www.ChangeThrivers.com. Contact reporter Sheryl Kay at 813 230-8788 or skreporter@hotmail.com.

I bought into the American dream, but I had lost myself."

- Afsaneh Noori, author whose book Change Thrivers chronicles how she has adapted to change, particularly adjusting to America after growing up in Iran.

[Last modified October 12, 2006, 08:15:51]