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A slice of humble pie on its way

By JAN GLIDEWELL
Published December 11, 2006

When I retired a little over three years ago, some friends and family doubted whether my ego would be able to withstand the blow of not seeing my picture and thoughts published in the St. Petersburg Times three days a week.

I never really thought I had that much of an ego. Except for my sparkling intelligence, devilish good looks and great sense of humor, I have always considered humility to be one of my best traits.

Actually I am pretty humble, and recent occurrences make me glad that I can handle the occasional sling or arrow that comes my way.

I was paying for my ticket at a Tampa movie theater a couple of weeks ago when the cashier, after I asked for a senior ticket, asked for my ID.

I was flattered.

"You sweet thing," I said, "do you honestly think I don't look 60?" (I am 62, and look every inch of it - see picture.)

She was silent with that indifference that makes us invisible and apparently inaudible to a lot of folks her age, but nothing was going to take this moment from me. I paid for my ticket and went inside, still glowing .

A couple of weeks later, the same thing happened with a different cashier at the same chain, and I found it less amusing. It was, I figured, one of those ridiculous corporate rules that you run into, like convenience stores - after they get burned in a sting - that card everyone, including people my age, who tries to buy a six-pack of beer.

"What's this about," I asked, still secretly enjoying being carded at my age. "I am obviously old enough for a senior ticket."

"Yes, you are" said the new, and slightly chattier cashier "but you didn't sign your credit card, and I need to see your ID to make sure it's you."

Fortunately, there were no witnesses.

Still on the subject of IDs, I was talking to a young bartender a few nights ago who recognized me. "See," I told my wife, "young people did read my column."

"Actually," he said, "when I was a kid, and we wanted to make false IDs, the background on the picture with your column was exactly the right shade for driver's licenses. We could Photoshop our pictures right over yours."

And I was equally flattered when a county official approached me a couple of months ago and asked me to pose for a poster for the Pasco County Library System entry into the READ poster contest sponsored by the American Library Association. He knew how to play me, telling me that the Bellamy Brothers were among those who would be asked to do future posters so, of course, I agreed.

"This is Bev Miller," said Linda Bragg, public relations specialist for the county libraries. "She took the picture of Sandy for last year's poster, and it won a national award.

Hmm ... I thought. Sandy Koufax? Sandra Bullock? British folksinger Sandy Denny?

Not exactly.

Sandy the three-legged dog.

Now I not only have to urge kids to read, I have to compete with a three-legged dog for award honors."

And even though Bev made me look pretty good ("Your coat looks so shiny, and your nose is wet," my wife noted), I am already preparing myself psychologically for the loss.

[Last modified December 11, 2006, 05:46:43]