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2006: A Look Back

A resolution to escape reality - on TV, that is

By JEFF WEBB
Published December 31, 2006

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As New Year's resolutions go, it wasn't bold and it wasn't one that would drastically alter my lifestyle. It wouldn't result in exercising more, losing weight or saving my pennies. And it certainly wouldn't correct some unconquerable vice. Those who know me may insert wisecrack here.

Perhaps the reason I chose it as my resolution for 2006 was because it seemed so easily done. After all, what would be the harm in giving up something that I really didn't like in the first place?

Little did I know.

First, I should explain that after many years of breaking just about every New Year's resolution because I either wasn't truly committed to the change, or I wasn't realistic in what could be accomplished, I gave up on the annual promises. I resolved to remain unresolved, if you will.

A few years ago, though, I started again, but changed the paradigm to take on something simple and cerebral, like looking for more opportunities to offer sincere compliments and thanks, or to look deeper and be more appreciative of others' talents and experiences.

I have been much more successful with that approach. No cold-turkey cravings. No guilt about a gained pound or a missed deadline. Just a goal to be, in some subtle way, a better person.

But last year I decided to add something more tangible to my resolutions and give up something I had grown to loathe: reality television.

I did it, but it wasn't easy. Not because it was hard to resist, but because it's hard to escape.

By reality, I don't mean just Survivor or Amazing Race or Fear Factor, but also all of those shows in which they make over houses and faces and personalities. Included in that mix were shows about birthing babies and surgeries; animals that are abused or are subjected to mind-reading whisperers; cookoffs and cops; bounty hunters and brides; debutantes and fashion models; tattoos artists and motorcyclemakers; weddings and court cases; poker and postmortems; whiny celebrities and wild wanna-bes. And don't forget the last comics - and dancers and singers and designers - standing.

I even included games shows and talk shows in the list of televised no-nos. (Although I made an exception for Jeopardy and The Daily Show, both of which are clearly educational.) And, even though I had no trouble flipping past the annual beauty pageants for humans, I could not sacrifice the Eukanuba and Westminster dog shows. (Again, wisecrackers feel free to weigh in on that contrast.)

So, once you eliminate all of those categories from your viewing menu, you will realize how these insidious shows are dominating the airwaves.

I don't mean to be a TV snob. I'm sure there are good people all over the planet who relish their reality shows, if not their personal reality. The ratings certainly prove their popularity.

And I don't want to sound like those erudite types who, when asked at the water cooler if they caught so-and-so show last night, smugly reply "I don't even own a television."

But I'm here to tell you that, other than having to look harder for something else, you not only can get by without them, you also won't even miss them. (Okay, I did miss Antiques Roadshow on PBS, and I sulked a little when my wife asked me how much longer it would take me to determine if CMT's Dallas Cowboy Cheerleaders: Making the Team was a bona fide reality show.)

Call me old-fashioned, but I still like to watch television to be entertained or escape reality, not insert myself into someone else's. I just refuse to waste more of my ever-dwindling leisure time watching yet another conflicted contestant or shameless self-promoter talk trash, flip out or get hurt (physically or emotionally) to reach a contrived and consistently anticlimatic conclusion.

Yes, this is a resolution I will renew.

In fact, maybe I'll amend it to include all shows with laugh tracks. Then I'll have some serious extra time on my hands - to exercise and lose weight and ...

Jeff Webb can be reached at (352) 754-6123 or webb@sptimes.com.

 

 

[Last modified December 31, 2006, 07:13:14]

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