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The skinny

By TIMES WIRES
Published March 31, 2007

A LESS CUTE MALADY

THE CAPTAIN HAS TURNED ON THE NO-COUGHING LIGHT

Everyone loved Hiccup Girl from St. Petersburg. Coughing Girl did not get the same reaction from Continental Airlines. Rachel Collier, 16, was on a plane to return home to Hawaii after a school trip to New York when she was overcome with a coughing fit. "Everyone was looking at me," she said. "I couldn't talk because I lost my voice coughing so much. I was panicking." A doctor on the flight said she was fine to make the trip, but the captain trumps doctors on planes, and he went back to the gate and booted her off. The airline put her and a teacher up for the night in a hotel, then flew her home the next day. The coughing did not last long enough for the Today show to get interested.

OH, BOY

After only 10 days, gender determined

Count on this turning into something at a theater near you soon. It seems that Alexander Cross, 42, was arrested in Hamilton County, Tenn., on charges of the aggravated statutory rape of a 15-year-old girl. But that was all before Cross took a shower in jail. That's when officials found out that Alexander Cross was actually Elaine Cross. This surprised not only the officials, but also other inmates ... and the victim, with whom Cross was charged with having some sort of sexual contact with at least three times. "After about 10 days in jail, they figure out Alex Cross is a female," Assistant District Attorney Boyd Patterson said. It was bound to come out eventually. Cross pleaded guilty to the charges.

HUNGRY CRIMINALS

Steak habit was his crime, downfall

In Bloomington, Ind., you can get away with skipping out on a bill for the exact same meal, with the exact same drinks, on the exact same day of the week, at the exact same time four weeks in a row. But if you try it five times, you're just asking for trouble. Each Wednesday, the man would come into O'Charley's, order two gin and tonics, then a ribeye, then excuse himself when the check - for $25.96, every week - came and never return. But this week, four employees confronted him at the exit, and he offered to pay by check. Uh, yeah, right. When told they don't accept checks, he ran. But a cop caught him. He's dining regularly at the Monroe County Jail for the time being.

Stealing from court is dedication to craft

Joan Hall, 65, and Roger Neff, 75, are on trial in Cleveland for running a multimillion-dollar scam against stores in the area. But, according to police, they didn't let a little thing like incarceration slow them down. A judge has banned them from the courthouse cafeteria after police say that Hall loaded a takeout lunch into a plastic bag, then placed it on a newspaper rack. After a few minutes, Neff moved it to the top of a garbage can. A few minutes later, they walked off with it. "You bring your lunch," Judge Nancy Fuerst said in banning them.

[Last modified March 31, 2007, 01:31:49]