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Lawyer practiced in ways of the heart

By ERNEST HOOPER
Published April 20, 2007

Mary Greenwood grew up in Michigan as a preacher's daughter. So when she enrolled in the University of Michigan law school, she swore there were two things she would never do: represent criminals or handle divorces.

Funny how things work out. Greenwood operates the Brandon Family Law Center on Lumsden Road and has practiced in the area since 1989. She handles divorces and adoptions, but said during lunch at Jesse's Steak & Seafood that her primary focus is helping people.

Pull up a chair and join us. ERNEST: As someone who practices family law, I know you handle divorces. Have there been cases where you helped people stay together?

MARY: I would say yes, and not necessarily because I counseled both of them. When someone comes to see me and I'm identified as their attorney, I'm real conscious about not creating a conflict of interest by advising the other people. But I will often tell my client, "Take your time." Divorce shouldn't be something you rush through. Most of the time, getting married is not something they rushed into, either. Relationships are strange and flexible, and they ebb and flow just like life. How rewarding is it when someone decides to work it out?

I'm always happy when they take a step back and reconcile. I'm the first to applaud them, and I've had a few who did that.

I guess divorce is more difficult than people might imagine.

It's about 80 percent emotion and about 20 percent business. If you have children, it might be 95 percent emotion. It's not difficult to take someone's financial picture and split it in two evenly, which is the premise you start with. That's the easy part. Getting someone to emotionally be okay with leaving the house that they've put a lot of sweat equity into, or getting someone to learn how to manage living half the time without their children sleeping in the same house with them. Those are the real-life issues. That's hard. You also handle adoptions. Tell me about that.

That is the best part of my practice. I had opened my own office for about a month, and a local teacher from one of our high schools came in the door. A situation had developed where someone had sent their child down to live with an uncle and aunt to have a child out of wedlock. The birth mother was about 16. I was able to put an arrangement together for them, and I fell in love with the adoption practice.

What are the challenges of working with the birth mother?

I try to get them to use this experience positively to better themselves. It's a growth experience for any woman doing that. I don't want them to try and sweep it under the rug mentally. It's healthy for them to get the support of their friends and family and make this a part of their life experience, acknowledge that they have a child out there. They may not be parenting that child, but there will be a child that will be a part of their life at some level.

What do you like most about the law?

I guess I would have to say the variety. It's never boring. It's the same kind of cases, but it's never the same because there is that people element. Everybody's stories are different. That's what I've come to love about the career, but there were years I didn't love it, because there's also pressure in the law when so many people are relying on you. In family law, they're relying on you sometimes for their happiness and to fix their broken lives. I'm a lawyer. I can't always do that. But that's the reward and sometimes the burden of my job. DESSERT: A postscript from Ernest

Greenwood grew up playing piano and singing in the church, and continues today as one of the founding members of Ichthus, the contemporary Christian group at Apostles Lutheran Church in Brandon. She also is president of the board at Apostle's Village, an assisted living facility being built next to the church. Greenwood's 11-year-old son, A.J., is one of the taller sixth-graders at Burns Middle School and an aspiring basketball player.

Ernest Hooper also writes a column for the Tampa & State section. He can be reached at hooper@sptimes.com or 226-3406.

[Last modified April 19, 2007, 07:02:00]