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Letter to the editor

Twined like a French horn, always in harmony

By STEPHANIE HAYES, Times Staff Writer
Published August 12, 2007

ADVERTISEMENT [Joseph Garnett Jr. | Times] Mariann Turner, daughter of Stephen Yanetovich hugs a family friend after a memorial service for her father Saturday afternoon. Stephen Yanetovich was band director at Clearwater High for 23 years. [Special to the Times] Stephen and Dorothy Yanetovich. Married nearly 65 years. Balanced like a scale.

CLEARWATER - He gave her greeting cards. Sometimes three per holiday and lots in between. He signed them loverboy, xoxo, I love you.

When she got sick, he would lie for hours, his head pressed to hers. He brought her ice cream and flowers, and sat with her outside to watch the birds.

They held on, as age and illness chipped at their bodies and minds.

Stephen and Dorothy Yanetovich. Married nearly 65 years. Balanced like a scale.

When she slipped away, he was not far behind.

- - -

He saw her in the crowd.

Stephen played the French horn in the Army Air Forces band. It was 1943, and he was stationed in St. Petersburg. After playing a concert in Williams Park, the soldiers had refreshments at a nearby Methodist church.

He was introduced to the church secretary - breezy demeanor, brown curls, gentle eyes. Stephen was sweet, but not a smooth talker.

Dorothy was charmed by Stephen, who knew how to play every musical instrument.

"I really like him," she told her friend, Sue Hilliard. From then on, Hilliard gave up her concert tickets so Stephen and Dorothy could have dates when he came to town.

"It was just like magic," Hilliard said.

- - -

They kissed like bullets - smooch-smooch-smooch-smooch.

She knew when he was home. He rang the doorbell like mad - ding-ding-ding-ding.

He liked to put his arm around her. Before she sat down, he would pull out her chair.

They rarely raised their voices. Didn't have to. They already knew.

- - -

Stephen's music career is legendary in Clearwater.

In the late 1940s, he became band director at Clearwater High School, where he stayed for 23 years. The students adored him.

He played in local orchestras and was a founder of the Pinellas Youth Symphony. He taught music at St. Petersburg College and until two years ago, substitute taught at elementary schools.

He would race home, eat dinner and leave again.

Dorothy didn't mind.

She handled the bookkeeping and organized his schedule. And she never missed one of his performances.

People would ask what instrument she played.

"None," she'd say. "I'm his audience."

- - -

By fall 2006, Dorothy's health began to decline, and dementia set in. In May, Dorothy and Stephen moved into St. Mark's Village in Palm Harbor.

Stephen thought she would get better. A different doctor. A new medicine.

"He grew up in that generation where if you eat, you'll get better," said Mariann Turner, the couple's only daughter. But now Stephen had his own battle to fight: terminal liver cancer.

Stephen's family suspects he may have been ill for a while, but didn't understand the severity.

"I think he thought, 'If I put it in the back of my mind, it'll go away,' " Turner said. "He didn't deal with it because he was dealing with her."

On July 11, doctors diagnosed Stephen.

On July 12, Dorothy died. She was 94.

- - -

Turner sat beside Stephen, who lay ill in a hospital bed.

"Dad, you know how mom has been sick for a long time."

He looked at her.

"She passed away."

Tears rolled down his face. He asked that his favorite violin solo be played at her service: Meditation from Thais.

Twenty-three days after his wife, Stephen died. He was 95.

Stephanie Hayes can be reached at shayes@sptimes.com or 727 893-8857.

The Yanetoviches

Dorothy Yanetovich

Born: Sept. 6, 1912.

Died: July 12, 2007.

Stephen Yanetovich

Born: July 20, 1912.

Died: Aug. 4, 2007.

Survivors: Daughter, Mariann Turner; grandchildren, Brinna Turner and Moriah Granger and husband James; great-grandson, Olliver Granger. Sylvan Abbey.

Donations: Stephen Yanetovich Scholarship Fund, c/o Pinellas Youth Symphony, P.O. Box 4106, Seminole, Fl, 33775-4106.

[Last modified August 12, 2007, 00:02:49]