Guest Column

This year, it's no more resolutions

By DARCY MANESS
Published December 28, 2007

The New Year is upon us again. Again! When I was younger, I was told that the years would pass quicker as I aged; boy was that an understatement!

I remember, as a kid, I actually believed summer vacation was a year long. Seriously. When my children started enjoying summer vacations, I wondered when their break became so short.

So here we are, facing another turn of a year, pondering the Make a New Year's Resolution philosophy. That got me to thinking of all the resolutions I'd made (and broken) over the years. Or the ones that started out great but needed to be renewed 12 months later.

It's exhausting to think about. What excessive pressure we've created for ourselves! I mean, you have the standard resolutions: lose weight, get healthier, work harder, be nicer and vote this year, to name a few. Then there are the bigger ones: visit family more often, pay off credit cards, go back to school and drive a nicer car.

When I went over resolutions I'd made, and with all my heart in them, I was truly exhausted. And worse, if you line them all up and check off the ones that remained a constant in your life, well, let's just say, it wouldn't look good on a resume.

So, I paced the house, the office and let my mind wander as I drove to my destinations for the week, and decided, no more. No more resolutions was going to be my New Year's resolution (does that in essence make it a resolution?). Here is going to be my plan for the future:

- Sleep in on weekends.

- Stay up later to watch Leno and Conan.

- Leave post-it notes of love throughout the house.

- Garden when I want, and weed only when needed. (I tend to be obsessive about weeds.)

- Not bother with makeup anymore. For the little I put on, what's the point?

- Drink coffee in the evenings. (Oh no! Say it isn't so!)

- Eat a big bowl of ice cream, piled with chocolate syrup as late as I want.

- Let my dogs take over the couch while I lounge on the big pillows.

- Walk for the fun of it, not for the health of it.

- View food as life instead of liberty. (Amen, brothers and sisters!)

- Ignore the insistently ringing phone after 5 p.m. (Don't these people want to be with their families in the evenings?)

- Pay my bills at face value. No more double payments, just the regular amounts. Do they thank me for the extras anyway? I think not.

And this last one is a revelation for me: Enjoy closing in on 50 - a half century of living.

The last one will take some self-talk, friendly counseling and a few stiff cocktails, but as I near 50, there is a lure about this age that both frightens me and liberates me at the same time.

It terrifies me because life is nearing twilight and I realize there are no do-overs, ever!

But it liberates me because I can be a few pounds overweight. It's not only accepted at this age but it's expected as well. (And for a professional anorexic, that is liberating.)

And with age, believe it or not kids, brings calming wisdom. Not I-told-you-so wisdom, but wisdom that enlightens the soul and carried us forward into the less stressful events to come. I know there are issues of working until retirement or retiring early; Medicare, taxes and insurance, etc. But I'm banking on the wisdom of aging to carry me through with a little more grace than youthful, chaotic decision-making has wrought me in the past.

New Year's resolutions? Not for me, not anymore. Not ever.

I'm just going to enjoy life and be the best person I've always known I could be; the person my grandchildren think I am.

Darcy Maness lives in Spring Hill.

[Last modified December 27, 2007, 21:05:05]