Being funny makes me feel good

By CECILIA TUCKER

© St. Petersburg Times, published July 17, 2000

A sense of humor is the key to survival, and I think that I have a good sense of humor. My sense of humor has developed over the past several years to the point that sometimes I find I laugh at myself! Now, you may think that would make me a bit narcissistic, but I want to tell you that is not true. When I am laughing at myself, I don't take myself so seriously, and I find that helps me in many situations.

When I was in elementary school, people thought I was pretty funny. And, when I didn't come across as sarcastic, my teachers even thought I was funny. When I went to middle school, everything changed. I thought I had to be cool, so I stopped being my funny self and started being the way I thought others wanted me to be. I found myself laughing at jokes other people told, even though I usually thought they were stupid. I was too afraid to say what I was really thinking. I usually thought what I could have said would have been funnier, but I wouldn't let myself risk the embarrassment of no one else thinking I was funny. So I would sit quietly and laugh on cue with everyone else. Dumb, huh! Yeah, I decided I was just too insecure to risk the possible rejection, so I'd just play along.

Well, playing along is getting real old. I find myself getting very bored with everyone else's humor. I am funnier than most people I hang around. My humor is quick and witty. I have been trying out my humor on a few people again, and they are actually laughing at what I say. I can tell a joke better than most people I know. I seem to never mess up the punch line. I am good with one-liners and with impromptu comments. I am beginning to think that I am pretty smart, and that's what it takes to be truly funny.

I used to think I was funny just to cover up how dumb I thought I was, but now I see I am not dumb. Smart people seem to think I am funny, and they like what I joke about. Maybe I help them take life a little less seriously. They usually get my humor. It's not just the smart kids, though, that are okay being with me because my humor seems to make everybody around me more relaxed. People just need to chill a little more, and I help them do that.

I am not scared of being embarrassed and rejected near as much anymore. I am funny because that's me. I like it that I can relax, knowing I am not hiding behind my humor but just going with it because it is me. I know I am hiding when I use sarcasm but not when I am witty. When I'm just being sarcastic, I get caught up in what others think about me. I am not funny at these times. This is my wall.

I am funny. I have a great sense of humor. I may not ever be a comedian, but that's okay. My humor is my friend, and if I let it, it will open doors for me. I will not use my humor to put down others or at the expense of hurting someone else's feelings. There are plenty of things in the world to laugh at without being hurtful. I am funny enough that I can find things and life events to laugh at, not people.

I like my sense of humor. I just want to be me wherever I am. My advice to anybody out there: Just forget about it and be yourself!

IT! (Private thoughts of the Indomitable Teen) is written by Cecilia Tucker, a licensed marriage and family therapist at the Counseling Center for New Direction in Seminole. Tucker, who has been in counseling practice since 1979, writes this column under the guidance of a panel of teenage advisers, who approve the topics and offer their insights (in exchange for pizza). You may write her c/o: IT!, X-Press, the Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, FL 33731, or e-mail Floridian@sptimes.com.

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