The middle of life offers many rewards, survey says

By JUDY STARK

© St. Petersburg Times, published July 25, 2000

Welcome to the best of times.

The image of the midlife years as a time of personal crisis, lack of control and declining physical health is largely a myth, according to a 10-year study of almost 8,000 Americans between the ages of 25 and 74. It was conducted by the MacArthur Foundation Research Network on Successful Midlife Development.

Take that popular notion, the midlife crisis, a time of personal turmoil and dread brought on by the realization that one is growing older. Only 10 percent experienced a crisis brought on specifically by the realization they were aging and might not accomplish all they had hoped.

Others who had a tough time in midlife said their crisis was brought on by some other event in their lives that had nothing to do with aging but simply happened to occur during those middle years.

How about that other popular midlife myth, the menopausal woman tormented by hot flashes and emotional upheavals as her body adjusts to hormonal changes. Sixty-two percent of the women surveyed said they experienced "only relief" when their menstrual periods ceased. Only 2 percent expressed regret.

"On balance, the sense we all have is that midlife is the best place to be," said Dr. Orville Gilbert Brim, who directed the study.

Respondents between the ages of 35 and 65, and particularly between 40 and 60, reported increased well-being and a greater sense of control over many parts of their lives. A majority said they felt better about their lives than they did 10 years before. On a scale of 1 to 10, with 10 being "best quality of life," children and marriage got 8s, overall life, health and work ranked in the 7s and social responsibility got a 6.

Mid-lifers have "often outgrown the instability and turmoil of youth but have yet to face the health challenges of old age," is the way USA Today described the findings of Brim and the team of 28 researchers.

The two areas over which those surveyed felt they had least control were finances and sexual activity (they rated those areas 5.5). Most reported their marriages were happy, with 90 percent saying it was either not very likely or not likely at all that their marriages would break up.

Midlife was defined as the time from 30 to 70 years of age, with 40 to 60 as the core. Those are the years to which respondents would return if they had the chance, not to their reckless youth. Men ages 65 to 74 said they would like to go back 32 years. Women in that group wanted to be 28 years younger.

"We have this public image of midlife being full of stress, but, in fact, (midlifers') sense of control is good and their sense of well-being is good," Brim said.

Want to "seniorize" your house?

Here are some simple steps that cost less than $50 each and require less than an hour to accomplish, suggested by the Leviton Institute, the education arm of Leviton Manufacturing Co., maker of lighting devices.

Put kitchen appliances on timers. They'll turn appliances off after a set amount of time, say, an hour. Use them with toaster ovens, hot plates and coffee makers. No need to wonder and worry if you turned something off. Cost: Less than $10.

Install a hand-held shower. They make bathing easy, whether you're sitting or standing. Cost: $15-$20.

Add hand rails and grab rails. Stairs should have railings on both sides. Put grab rails at strategic spots: near doors, along steps, on the wall next to the bed. Replace towel bars in the bathroom with grab rails. Cost: Less than $50.

Replace doorknobs with lever handles. Make things easier for those with arthritis or limited hand strength. Cost: Less than $20.

Replace toggle wall switches with rocker switches. You can turn these off with a light tap, or use an elbow or shoulder if your hand strength is limited. Cost: Less than $4.

Increase lighting levels. As we age, our eyes require brighter lighting. Use higher-wattage bulbs if your fixtures can handle them. Add table or floor lamps. You can plug a six-outlet adapter into a duplex outlet to add more lights without running extension cords. Cost: Less than $5.

I'll add this from my own experience: Place rubberized-mesh backing under your area rugs to keep them from slipping and sliding. You can buy this backing at home centers and carpet stores and cut it to fit. It really works; we have several area rugs around our house and with this backing beneath them they don't move.

Thanks to all who sent in their suggestions for gifts they'd really like to receive. As usual, you came up with better ideas than I ever could. We're still compiling them; watch for a story a little closer to the holidays.

Several readers reminded us that not everyone has a computer and requested toll-free numbers or mailing addresses for some of the products featured in last month's column. Here's the information you requested:

Gold Violin, the source for senior gifts, can be reached toll-free at (877) 648-8465. As we reported, Zelco, maker of the X-tremely Bright Flashlight and the UltraBlast whistle keylight, can be reached at (800) 431-2486. The online senior store (www.seniorstore.com) is just that: online sales only.

A popular mail-order company that sells devices to make daily living easier, Comfort House, has now ceased to publish its catalog and sells online only

(www.comforthouse.com). Comfort House has big key holders for arthritic hands that one reader wrote in to inquire about.

If anyone knows where else to find these holders -- they're plastic jackets that fit over keys to give you something big and solid to hold onto and turn easily -- let us know.

Another reader wanted to know where to find a key ring that beeps when you clap your hands (for a friend who's always losing her keys; raise your hand if you share her problem!). If you know where to find these, drop us a note (my address is at the end of the column) and we'll share the information.

Right in our own back yard is Carolyn's Low Vision Solutions. Call (800) 648-2266 for a catalog, which offers information about 200 of their most popular items, but they have about 500 items on display at their store, at 1415 57th Ave. W in Bradenton. The store is open 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Monday through Thursday. Call before you go because occasionally they close briefly during the day. Many of the products are designed for those with impaired vision: magnifying devices and large-print bingo cards, talking clocks, watches and calculators and high-contrast versions of popular games. But they also offer automatic card shufflers, cooking devices and other household helps.

- Send your comments to Judy Stark, c/o Seniority, St. Petersburg Times, P.O. Box 1121, St. Petersburg, FL 33731.

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