TAMPA -- For years, suicide was almost as much of his focus as football. His father, his grandfather and his great-grandfather took their lives. And Leon Hires, the Bucs' 23-year-old free-agent lineman, spent the early years of his adult life fearing he would do the same.

[Times photo: Jim Damaske]
Leon Hires, shown here toweling off at training camp Friday morning, says he's happy with the chance to make an NFL roster.

It started in 1990 when Hires' grandfather, Leon, shot himself. Hires, who grew up in Bradenton and attended Manatee High, was with his father when they heard the news.

Then, in 1997, Hires' father, Ed, turned a gun on himself. Hires was a second-year offensive lineman at Notre Dame. Just after his father's funeral, Hires discovered his great-grandfather committed suicide.

Hires' life changed. Suicide became strikingly real and playing football increasingly difficult, its violence and brutality causing Hires to become too emotional.

He sought professional help and was prescribed antidepressants. As a result of his father's death, he decided to leave Notre Dame three games into the 1997 season and moved in with his father's brother, Ted, who lived in Jacksonville.

Counseling and medication helped, and Hires soon wanted to return to the field. Thanks to an NCAA waiver, he signed with the University of Florida in 1998 and played three seasons, starting all 13 games last season.

After going undrafted, Hires signed with the Bucs in April. He participated in off-season workouts and is fighting for a roster spot in training camp. To Hires, his problems seem long ago.

"That happened a good five years ago. It's in the past. I've put that behind me," Hires said, walking off the field after an afternoon practice at Pepin/Rood Stadium. "I'm operating on a full tank now. I'm not hurting like I was when I was at Notre Dame and when I transferred down here."

Hires said he no longer is on medication and doesn't require counseling -- unless you count his family, which still worries about him. "They check up on me once in a while and ask me how I'm doing and if I don't sound too chipper, they're like, 'Are you sure you're okay?' " he said.

He talks frequently with his uncle, who he credits with helping him break the cycle of suicide in their family.

"It's just time. Letting time go by. Time heals just about anything," he said. "When you have problems that arise, you fall back on your family for support and you just try to get through it. And the biggest thing is, the more time that goes by, the easier it is to move on."

Hires said it took him a while to realize that, but he is comfortable with his past and his future.

"Acknowledging what exists and understanding it is nine-tenths of the battle," Ted told the Orlando Sentinel. "The rest is a matter of getting treatment and doing what you're supposed to. It's amazing once you accept the diagnosis."

As with anyone who has been diagnosed with depression, there is concern about relapse. With the Bucs, Hires faces long odds of making the team. He has been switched to center from his more natural guard and tackle positions, but he's up against plenty of competition.

Hires, though, said he's not concerned about being released and falling back into any stage of depression. He understands his fate is not predetermined by his family's history, and that disappointments are part of life.

With or without football, Hires said, he's going to be fine.

"I don't have those problems anymore. I'm on top of the world," he said. "I have a chance here to be a part of an NFL team. There's nothing else I want more.

"And I have a degree (in business administration), so if (football) doesn't work out, I can go and use that degree to the best of my abilities. You know, I've got all kinds of reasons to count my blessings and be happy."

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