The cavern club

Like crawling in complete darkness through tight spaces coated with slime and God knows what else? Have we got a cave (or four) for you. Bring your flashlight, and your guts.

[Times photos: Kevin Sullivan] DOWN YOU GO: Amy Emmert from MOSI directs explorers into the Peace Cave in the Withlacoochee State Forest, one of four caves explored this day by her intrepid group.

By ALINE MENDELSOHN

© St. Petersburg Times, published August 7, 2000

Bryan Triplett, a carpenter by trade, looks like a soldier ready for battle. He's decked out in camouflage pants, Gore-Tex boots and a Wrangler jean jacket.

Sue Kelly, a mom by trade, wears a slate-colored tank top, shorts and Teva sandals. She looks like she's headed for the mall, not the wilderness.

Early on a recent Saturday, Triplett, Kelly and 11 other adventurers have gathered at Tampa's Museum of Science and Industry with a common goal: exploring four little-known Florida caves. About every three months, the museum sponsors a caving expedition in Withlacoochee State Forest led by a trained tour guide.

Anyone willing to crawl through tight underground spaces can tackle these Citrus County wonders. Though these caves pale compared to Kentucky's Mammoth Cave, after a day of exploring you leave the forest with a sense of accomplishment. And a need for a shower.

HELLO DOWN THERE: Guide Emmert looks for an opening in the rock for her explorers to enter.

If tight, enclosed spaces leave you short of breath, you might want to try something else. Caves are a claustrophobe's nightmare.

If you go, don't wear anything that you can't live without, because you're going to get really dirty, as in caked with mud.

Even if you aren't afraid of the dark, bring a flashlight. Hitting your head against a rocky ceiling is nobody's idea of fun.

Everyone on this trip knows all of this. Still, as the white MOSI van blazes through Hillsborough, Pasco and Hernando counties, no one knows what to expect.

After an hour of driving, tour leader Amy Emmert, a 23-year-old USF biology major, pulls off near a country road and leads the clan into the forest.

"We're not in Kansas anymore," Land O'Lakes resident John Corlett says.

"This isn't Busch Gardens," adds Sue Kelly, who is from Tampa. "This is Mother Nature we're fooling with."

The plan is to hit four caves today: Peace, Vandal, Sick Bat and Danger. A fifth, dubbed Potty Cave, is not on the itinerary. Emmert doesn't elaborate on why it smells the way it does.

She offers some tips: Crouch low, always hold a hand up to feel the ceiling and watch out for critters.

Critters?

Nothing to worry about, just little guys like rats, bats and cave crickets.

What about bears?

"I've never seen a bear," Emmert assures everyone. Under her breath, she adds, "Then again, I've been on three trips."

Members of the group straighten their caps and push backpacks and coolers off to the side.

Kelly's 8-year-old son, Hayden, points to the flashlight attached to his 12-year-old sister's hat. "Hey Leslie, can I wear your spelunker?"

"It's called a headlight," she replies, exasperated. Little brothers.

MUD PUPPIES: Steven Kuba, above left, and Hayden Kelly, both 8, were joined by only one fearless adult in exploring Danger Cave, thick with 3-inch-deep mud.

A spray-painted peace sign from long ago peels from a tree outside Peace Cave. The mouth of the cave gapes from the ground. Slowly and steadily, each caver lowers into the hole, grasping tree roots or rocks for support.

Inside, rocks jut from the ceiling, leaving a crawl space about 3 feet high. Farther inside, a clearing allows cavers to stand up, temporarily: Beyond this comfort zone the ceiling dips again.

"Everyone turn your flashlights off," Emmert says, and everyone obeys. "Right now it is 10 times darker than when you close your eyes at night. Now go explore."

She won't tell you what lurks around the corner. That you have to find for yourself.

"I bet there are skulls in here," says John Corlett's son, Morgan.

The kids traipse around the nooks and crannies while the adults feel their way more cautiously. Kids don't have to worry about bad backs or arthritic knees. Being short is a godsend, allowing easy access to narrow passages like one in Peace Cave.

HEADS UP: Leslie Kelly, 12, and her mom, Sue Kelly, look toward their escape route. “This isn’t Busch Gardens,” Sue Kelly says.

After his son Hayden snakes through, Pete Kelly looks to his wife, Sue, and shrugs. He squeezes his 6-foot-2 frame into the space. Standing behind him, Sue hesitantly hoists herself through and immediately regrets it. Though she is a slender woman, the space is tight, and she panics. What if she gets stuck?

"I don't think I'll be doing that again any time soon," she says after she manages to come out.

For Triplett, the carpenter from New Port Richey and veteran of 50 caving expeditions, Peace Cave is "kind of lame." He is glad to move on to the next stop, the more challenging Vandals Cave.

This natural wonder's name is self-explanatory. Men (and women) have definitely trod here. You can tell by the gifts they left behind -- the Bud Light bottle label, the empty bag of Rold Gold Snack Mix, the flattened Marlboro Reds box.

In red and blue spray paint inside the cave, previous visitors have left their marks: "Yvette," "Korn," "Burnouts 4 Life," plus the occasional profanity and enough marijuana references to cover a mural. Scrawled in angry black letters near the entrance: "YOU WILL DIE."

"Teenagers," sniffs Morgan, 11.

Entry to the next cave, Sick Bat, requires a 4-foot drop down slippery rocks. Once everyone makes it inside, Sue Kelly asks, "Anyone need CPR?"

A delighted child exclaims, "Mom, there are bats in here!"

Lo and behold, bats, and in Sick Bat Cave of all places! These bats aren't of the Disney variety, black and beady-eyed, squawking around the cave opening. Instead, they resemble oversized brown moths and could fit snugly in the palm of your hand.

"Aren't those cute?" Leslie says.

Cute is not the word John Corlett's wife, Wendy Corlett, would use to describe the bats, but she's okay with them as long as they're not flying in her face. Still, she's glad to leave Sick Bat for the grand finale, the ominous-sounding Danger Cave.

The mystique behind the cave heightens when Emmert has trouble finding it. "I'll be right back," she tells the group. "I know it's around here."

The kids walk around the woods restlessly. Triplett examines rocks for arrowheads. Sue Kelly is in no rush to explore Danger Cave; she doesn't like the implications of the name.

Talk of Survivor begins.

"You never know what's going to happen next," says Morgan's dad, John. His eyes twinkle. "What if we have to eat rats? And we never get out? It could be the Blair Cave Project."

Who would be the last survivors in the forest? Most cavers have their money on Triplett and Emmert.

After about 15 minutes, Emmert finds Danger Cave. The first ones down discover a slimy tunnel, the part of the cave that will separate the dirty from the filthy. Only three cavers find the courage to cross that line.

Hayden, slick with mud, pops out of the tunnel, the Florida Gators logo on his T-shirt unrecognizable.

"This is the dirtiest I've ever gotten!" he squeals, delighted.

"That's what we call going in commando-style," Emmert says.

Eight-year-old Steven Kuba also goes in commando-style. He peers at his legs, pointing to scrapes.

"War wounds," Emmert says as she inspects his knees. She pats his back. "You'll be fine."

Triplett emerges under a layer of mud, like a soldier. The camouflage pants are a nice touch. This is what he calls a cave.

"Dirt under my nails, dirt on my hands, dirt on my knees," Leslie mutters.

It's nothing compared to her brother Hayden, who again announces, "This is the dirtiest I've ever been!"

As they approach the van, Sue Kelly glances at him and asks, "Who's going to sit next to Hayden?"

Everyone is ready to go home, the adults exhausted, the kids energized.

There are no losers in this version of Survivor. Then again, there's no $1-million jackpot. Just 13 people who really need a bath.

Want to go?

WHAT: Cave Exploration/Geology Adventure

BRING: flashlight, lunch, water, clothes that can get dirty

COST: $35 for MOSI members, $45 non-members

CALL: (813) 987-6000

NEXT DATE: To be announced

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