By JULES ALLEN
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Plug 'n' drive
God bless America, land of the free, home of the brave and driveway to monster-size vehicles. Maybe it's a boundary thing: We've got masses of unused land so we need SUVs the size of school buses to help pad the place out a bit. It's sort of like a large room with no furniture. You'd think the motor vehicle manufacturers might be smart to this collective thinking. But no, they continue to push environmentally friendly, skateboard-size cars in the hope we'll change our ways. This Ford-funded electric car is a minor hit in Europe, but I just can't see it in use here.
A bad hair day
When somebody mentioned this site, I thought he said "feathered back hirsute," which, of course, would be mildly disgusting. Personally, I take a weed whacker to my back hair once a month to keep it prim and socially acceptable now that it's beach weather. Like bell bottoms and everything '70s, the hairstyle that Farrah and Valerie made popular is back in vogue. If you had attended the family reunions that I've been to over the years, you could argue that it never went away. But that's a Web site for another day.
Look Ma, no wires!
Wireless local area networks are huge this year, in case you've been under a rock. It's a natural progression for mobile computing. Corporate types are handed nice, high-end laptops. When they're not playing solitaire on the plane, they're sitting in meetings around the office. If you go to the kinds of meetings I do, there's a scramble to get the network port on the wall and the lowest ranking folk usually lose. Ergo, wireless. But imagine being able to roam anywhere there might be a cappuccino bar and get the same high-speed Internet access. If grass-roots efforts such as this take hold, it could be reality in metropolitan areas across the globe. We can dream.
A government improvement
The White House-dot-gov site has recently undergone a major upgrade and, for the most part, it works. Accessible government (especially the bit at the very top) is generally a very good idea. But leave it to the Web to have a bit of fun at the prez's expense and a much needed sense of humor. Click over to the newly instated Department of Faith and giggle, Betty Bowers style. If you can't laugh at parody, by the way, save yourself the agony of writing a nasty letter to my editor and go somewhere else.
Mark his words
One thing you won't see at the all new White House site is a listing of our president's bumbling grammatical gaffes, which is hardly surprising. And it's good for morale because we, the people, haven't had this much fun since Reagan's heyday. This site contains a neat catalog of the misunderestimated things that dropped out of George W.'s mouth along with corrections. Hey, it's better than having to work on a Monday morning.
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