By JANET K. KEELER

© St. Petersburg Times,
published November 7, 2001

Have you ever been to party where the host looks like a cat on a hot tin roof?

She skitters nervously from the kitchen to the living room. A light tap on the shoulder brings a shriek; a spilled glass causes tears.

Not much fun, is it? By the time you leave, you're a quivering mess, too.

On the other end of the spectrum is the host who couldn't care less if you have a good time. She's so busy refilling her own wine glass that she fails to introduce the guests to each other. The moody boyfriend gets more attention than the friends who drive 30 miles for the party.

Somewhere in between is the host with the most. The person whose parties are legendary for their good company and wonderful food. Hers are the parties you can't stop talking about and to which you will do anything for an invitation.

This holiday season you can be that host. Armed with a few tips, the most important of which is "be yourself," and a shopping list, you can throw a fun, inexpensive party. We'll lead you down the grocery store aisles and through the mental obstacle course. No party pooping, either. Take a deep breath and repeat after us, "I can host a party. I can host a party."

Does it seem early to be thinking of a holiday party? Well, Thanksgiving is two weeks from Thursday, and the first post-Thanksgiving-weekend Saturday, the start of the Christmas party season, is less than 31/2 weeks away. The time for party planning is now.

Kathy Gunst, author of the just-released Relax, Company's Coming (Simon & Schuster, 2001, $25), says there are likely to be more parties this holiday season in light of the uncertainty following Sept. 11 and the continuing war in Afghanistan. With some folks still nervous about travel, traditional holiday gatherings may take different forms. Families who usually come together may be marking the holidays apart this year, so friends may be more inclined to commune.

"Among the small group of people that I talk to, they are saying it's just not worth it to travel this year," Gunst says. "There is a fear of traveling at a busy time."

This year, she says, holiday gatherings, be they Thanksgiving weekend brunches or December cocktail parties, have more meaning.

"Our perspective about what's worth being stressed over has changed," she says. "Are two or three side dishes important enough to get nervous about? The importance of the party and the people is more important than the food."

That's lesson No. 1. Don't lose sight of why you're entertaining, Gunst says.

"The primary goal is to be with people you care about, not to have the perfect table or to create the perfect souffle."

How did we get to the point where having a few people over required a week of scouring cookbooks, an entire day of cooking and a call to a cleaning service? When did cocktails and hors d'oeuvres become so complicated?

Gunst blames increasingly out-of-touch magazines and cooking shows. We can't compete or replicate the exotic food served on unique dinnerware placed on stunningly decorated tables. For heaven's sake, many of us don't even cook anymore.

Still, wouldn't it be nice to have a few friends over on a Saturday night when the house is decorated for the holidays?

No host is an island

Don't be beyond asking good friends to bring something, but be careful not to overburden them. For instance, Gunst says, if you've just listened to your friend complain for 15 minutes about how stressed out she is with work, the kids, the house, etc., don't ask her to bring her crab dip, no matter how your heart is set on it.

If a work colleague offers to contribute, tell him he can if he has the time but that a bottle of wine would be just as welcome.

Be honest about how much you can and want to do. If you love to cook and must spend a week's worth of evenings in the kitchen, be our guest. Something less than Julia Child? Come up with a menu that combines store-bought items with a few home-cooked dishes. Make the one thing you make best, your signature dish, and let the store do the rest.

"If you are starting to have fear and anxiety, you are doing something wrong," Gunst says.

Are you worried about cleaning the house from floors to rafters? In her book, Gunst suggests cleaning only the rooms you'll be using. This won't work, though, if you've just moved in and people want tours. If tours aren't on the agenda, stash that pile of school papers in a spare room and have the kids store toys in their own rooms instead of their usual spot in the dining room.

For a small house without much storage space, a nice flower arrangement and some pretty candles will draw attention to the table and away from the pile of stuffed animals in the corner.

Gunst reminds us that people aren't at parties to judge the host. They are usually just happy that someone cared enough to invite them to her home. What's a few dust bunnies between friends?

Speaking of friends, consider your guest list carefully. Invite friendly and interesting people, especially if they don't know each other. All the good food in the world won't make up for a room of people who won't talk or are just plain crabby.

Party food, party fun

How much food to make is always a challenge at a party. People will generally eat less than you think because they are busy talking to and meeting other guests. A good rule for a cocktail party is to offer enough food for each person to have about eight bites. That might mean two miniquiches, one egg roll, two crackers with shrimp dip, one fruit kabob with yogurt dip, a handful of minicarrots and a cupcake. That's a fair amount of food if your guests have already eaten dinner or will be eating later. Remember, some people will eat double and others won't eat at all.

Drinks create another dilemma for many party givers. Again, don't fret over the libations. People often bring a bottle of wine to parties as gift for the host, so you're not likely to run out of that. Beer, wine and a selection of non-alcoholic drinks are the simplest offerings. Plan for partyers to have two to three drinks each; again, some will drink more and others less.

Mixed drinks mean more planning and more money. The new Perfect Cocktails: The Essential Guide by Marthe Le Van (Lark Books, 2001, $7.95) offers tips about serving glasses, mixers and alcohol. Consider something less than a complete bar and offer a few fun mixed drinks such as Irish coffee or hot buttered rum if it's chilly or margaritas and daiquiris, anytime drinks in Florida.

Make sure there is plenty of food to offset the effects of the alcohol. Replenish serving trays regularly.

There are many, many cookbooks with appetizer recipes. They can be as simple or elaborate as you'd like, and we've included some simpler recipes with this story. We took a stroll through the grocery store aisles to find items that could supplement whatever home-cooked items you make. A suggestion: Take them out of the plastic containers or bags and put them on plates or in bowls. You want it to be easy, not to look cheap.

Here's what we found:

Asian fare. Frozen egg rolls, either regular size cut in half or bite size, can be served with dipping sauces such as hot mustard or sweet and sour sauce found in the Asian food aisle. Sushi, fish or vegetable varieties, makes an easy appetizer. Keep the sushi cold by nesting the serving tray in a larger container full of ice. Egg rolls cost about $5 for eight, and California rolls are about $4 for 9 pieces.

Deli style. Order meat and cheese trays from the deli. You can make your own cheese trays by selecting a variety of hard cheeses such as Cheddar and Monterey Jack and offering them with softer cheeses such as Havarti, Brie and Camembert. Add crackers as needed. Cheese (about $3 a pound) and cold cuts (up to $8 a pound) can get quite expensive, and if you go this route, they probably should be your main appetizers. In that case, don't skimp.

Little bites. Minibagels with flavored cream cheeses and bite-size taquitos, pizza rolls and "poppers," breaded jalapenos with cheese, from the frozen food section. These are inexpensive appetizers, about $3 for a dozen, and are filling.

Snick-snacks. Pretzels come in all sorts of shapes and sizes. Offer them with warmed cheese dip or spicy mustards. Other handfuls of goodness: mixed nuts, trail mix, M&Ms and popcorn. These are good "filler" items to set around the entertaining area. Prices vary here, but $10 worth of quick snacks will probably be enough for a party of 10.

Seaworthy. Cold, cooked and peeled shrimp is always a winner on the hors d'oeuvres table. Dip them in cocktail sauce -- how can you go wrong? You'll pay about $10 a pound for ready-to-eat shrimp, but you can reduce that by a couple of bucks if you cook and peel them yourself. Look for fish spreads in the seafood section and expect to pay about $2.50 for a small container. Buy a couple of different types and serve them with crackers.

Meat, meat and more meat. Frozen meatballs, to be eaten with toothpicks and jarred marinara dipping sauce, cost about $7 for 3 pounds. A 1-pound kielbasa is about $5. Grab a couple, saute in beer and serve bite-size slices with grainy mustard.

Fresh produce. Fruits and vegetables give guests watching their weight something to nibble on and are refreshing additions to the buffet table. Veggie trays are available in most stores. Dress them up with sliced jicama or sugar snap peas. Bottled ranch or blue cheese dressings are good for dipping. Skewer precut chunks of fruit on wooden sticks and use Yoplait's custard-style yogurt as a dip.

Hummus a tune. Hummus, the Middle Eastern dip made of garbanzo beans, comes in many flavors -- roasted garlic, roasted red pepper, eggplant and black olive are just some. They cost about $3.50 a container. Serve with pita or bagel chips for dipping; vegetables are good, too. Pair tabouli (from a box mix) with a hummus medley.

Sweet reward. Always offer something sweet. Frozen apple turnovers (about $2.50 for four) are tasty and easy to eat. Accompany sliced pound cake with whipped cream (Cool Whip!) and defrosted berries laced with Grand Marnier or orange juice. Adults, as well as kids, like cupcakes, so order some up at the grocery store bakery decorated to fit your theme. Dip apple slices in caramel apple dip.

A holiday party is within your grasp if you keep it simple, stay focused on your guests and have a table on which to lay out party treats.

Isn't it time for Nervous Nelly and Self-centered Sheila to change their ways?

Bacon Cheese Puffs

• 1 pound sliced bacon
• 2-1/2 cups shredded Cheddar cheese
• 2 tablespoons mustard
• 1 cup mayonnaise
• 1 pound sliced pumpernickel party bread

Place bacon in a large, deep skillet. Cook over medium-high heat until evenly brown. Drain, crumble and set aside.

Preheat oven to broil.

In a medium bowl, combine the bacon, cheese, mustard and mayonnaise. Stir well. Arrange party bread on a cookie sheet. Spoon mixture onto each slice of bread.

Broil for 5 minutes or until bubbly. Makes 30 appetizers.

-- Source: www.allrecipes.com.

Brie and Cranberry Pizza

• 1 8-ounce can refrigerated crescent rolls
• 8 ounces cubed brie cheese
• 3/4 cup whole berry cranberry sauce
• 1/2 cup chopped pecans

Preheat oven to 425 degrees. Lightly grease a 12-inch pizza pan or 9- by 13-inch baking dish.

Unroll the crescent rolls and separate into triangles. Arrange in the pan with tips toward the center and lightly press together to form one crust.

Bake 5 minutes or until lightly brown. Remove from the oven and sprinkle with pieces of brie. Spoon the cranberry sauce over the cheese. Top with pecans.

Bake an additional 8 minutes or until the cheese is melted and the crust is golden brown. Cool 5 minutes and cut into wedges or squares.

-- Source: www.allrecipes.com.

Marinated Goat Cheese

• 12 ounces goat cheese
• 3 tablespoons olive oil
• 1 cup diced sun-dried tomatoes
• 1 cup black olives, chopped
• 4 tablespoons chopped fresh basil
• 2 tablespoons chopped fresh rosemary
• 3 cloves garlic, halved

Slice goat cheese into 1-inch pieces and place in a single layer on a large platter. Sprinkle olive oil, sun-dried tomatoes, black olives, basil and rosemary over the cheese.

Using toothpicks, insert the garlic cloves into the cheese throughout the mixture. Allow the mixture to marinate 6 hours or overnight in the refrigerator. Remove the toothpicks and serve with sliced French bread.

Makes 10 servings.

-- Source: www.allrecipes.com.

Florentine Artichoke Dip

• 1 10-ounce package frozen chopped spinach, thawed, drained and squeezed dry
• 1 14-ounce can artichoke hearts, drained and chopped
• 3 cloves garlic, minced
• 1/2 cup mayonnaise
• 2 8-ounce packages cream cheese, softened
• 2 tablespoons lemon juice
• 1 cup grated Parmesan cheese

Preheat oven to 375 degrees. Lightly grease a 7- by 11-inch baking dish.

In a medium bowl, mix together the cream cheese and mayonnaise until smooth. Mix in the artichoke hearts, spinach and Parmesan cheese. Season with garlic and lemon juice. Spread evenly into the prepared baking dish.

Bake covered for 20 minutes. Remove the cover and let the dish bake uncovered for 5 more minutes, or until the surface is lightly browned.

-- Source: www.allrecipes.com.

Stuffed Baked Potato Slices

• 3 medium potatoes, peeled and sliced about 1/4-inch thick
• 1 cup grated Cheddar cheese
• 1/2 cup bacon bits
• 1 cup sour cream

Preheat oven to 400 degrees.

Place the sliced potatoes in a lightly greased baking pan, not touching and in a single layer. Lightly brush them with olive oil and a little kosher salt.

Bake for about 15 minutes, until easily sliced with a fork but firm. Sprinkle about a tablespoon of cheese on each slice and top with bacon bits. Put them back in the oven for a few minutes, watching closely, and take them out as soon as the cheese is melted. Serve immediately with a small dollop of sour cream.

-- Source: adapted from www.allsands.com.

Holiday Pepper Cheese Dip

• 1 cup low-fat sour cream
• 1 8-ounce package cream cheese, softened
• 1/4 cup chopped, pitted ripe olives
• 2 cups shredded Pepper Jack cheese
• 1 2-ounce jar diced pimento, drained
• 1 tablespoon sliced green onion

Combine cream cheese and sour cream in small mixer bowl. Beat at medium speed, scraping bowl often, until smooth (1-2 minutes).

Stir in all remaining ingredients by hand. Cover; refrigerate at least 2 hours. Serve with tortilla chips. Makes 3 cups.

-- Source: www.allrecipes.com.

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