Exercise in exorcism is ripe with possibilities

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© St. Petersburg Times,
published November 30, 2001

At first I was really worried.

A quick, and slightly dyslexic reading of an official proclamation in Inglis had me momentarily afraid that they had run Santa out of town.

Turns out it was only Satan. What better combination can a small town offer than good food, an official remembrance of Elvis and a government that has banned the devil from the city limits?

I'll admit that it isn't Satan or Elvis (and yes, to those of you who think otherwise, they are separate entities) on my mind when I hit the sleepy little town of Inglis on U.S. 19 north of Crystal River. More likely, I am on my way to Decembers Restaurant in Inglis or the Izaak Walton Lodge in nearby Yankeetown.

But apparently some Inglis folks, including the mayor and city clerk, are more concerned about Satan, whom, separation of church and state be . . . uh . . . damned, they have banned from town.

So says Mayor Carolyn Risher in an official proclamation that she plans on hanging from her office wall and copies of which have been stuffed into four wooden posts on the roads leading into town.

The posts, according to my colleague Alex Leary, whose story on the banning was published in Thursday's Times, bear the messages "Repent," "Request," and "Resist," at least two of which I should pay more attention to when I'm headed to Izaak's.

I don't intend here to ridicule persons who believe in the existence of Satan and genuinely fear his presence, although I think banning (or inviting, for that matter) him is more a function of clerical than of secular authorities.

But then, according to Mayor Risher's proclamation, Satan has "caused division, animosity, hate, confusion, ungodly acts on our youth and discord among our friends and loved ones."

Kind of sounds like the view that some Crystal River politicians have of me and my fellow journalists.

Although I firmly disagree with her on several different points, I honestly do believe that Risher is sincere in her efforts to ban The Evil One from her tiny town of 1,400, especially since she points out in the proclamation that she has been both duly elected by the citizens of Inglis and, incidentally, appointed by God to her position.

And I would be remiss in not pointing out that, when Yankeetown spurned Elvis by refusing to name part of County Road 40 as Follow That Dream Parkway, Risher, whose office walls bear pictures of The King right next to where she plans on hanging the anti-devil proclamation, rose to the occasion, saying the movie after which Inglis' portion of the highway was named "changed my life."

Cities with an eye for publicity caught on years ago to the trick of proclaiming themselves "Nuclear Weapons Free Zones" or space alien welcoming centers, in return for a three-paragraph story on the newswire and a picture of the mayor signing the proclamation.

Risher has a genuine concern for things like theft, driving drunk and fathers molesting their daughters. And City Clerk Sally McCranie, who also signed the proclamation, adds that some kids in town have been painting their faces white and are wearing black clothes (the kids call it Goth.)

Both see their proclamation as a valid effort by themselves and other "blood-bought children of God to force Satan and all of his demonic forces to leave Inglis."

How effective their efforts are remains to be seen and that effectiveness is more likely to be quantified in subjective rather than objective terms.

Personally, if I was looking for the devil in politics, I would be looking more toward Tampa, where corruption has been lately believed to be an art form, or Tallahassee, where several agencies and a Legislature are currently working hard at cutting needed services, protecting pork and figuring out new ways to make Bob's Barricades the state animal.

Nonetheless I am reassured that Santa is welcome in Inglis and that if he hears someone shout "Freeze fat man and drop the Harry Potter books," it won't be official. Probably just a visitor from Pasco County.

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