By JULES ALLEN
© St. Petersburg Times, published January 18, 1999
An apple a day
I try to keep Site Seeing as platform-neutral as possible, but noteworthy exceptions bubble up and make it past the rule police. McAffee's Virus Clinic (click on PC clinic on the main page) is an up-to-date virus scanner that sits in your browser and scans your hard disk for electronic miscreants. It is perfect for lazy home users who can't be bothered to get the latest virus update files to keep their systems disinfected. Virus Clinic relies on Microsoft's Internet Explorer 4 and will run only on Windows PCs. It is currently free, but at some point it will be $6 a month. So if nothing else, you get a free virus scanner for a while. While you're in this responsible mode, visit microsoft.com/security/ bulletins/ms98-020.asp and get the latest security update to IE 4.
And I used to work in advertising
Oh, the joy of bad advertising! Really bad ads are actually a lot better than the really good ads, in my humble opinion. They help you remember the product; you might take pity on the manufacturer and buy because of it; and it gives Web site owners the chance to take up valuable bandwidth with rubbish such as this site. During my visit to this site, the Annoying J Crew Model of the Week caught my eye and the Frightening Stew Lady has scared me to vegetarianism for at least the rest of this week.
No, they're not joking
When 270-million people are crammed together on the same continent, it is inevitable that a certain number will do strange things for no apparent reason. No, we don't have to travel to California for this one. A Miami couple has decided to take their 1979 Chevy Malibu station wagon to visit every state in the Union. And then back to Miami by Dec. 31 for the New Year's bash.
You've got mail!
When I first moved here, I thought I had left a lot of tacky things behind in the old country, such as really bad postcards. English seaside resorts are famous for their vulgar, supposedly funny gifts ("kiss me quick" hats) and postcards that would make a strong man weep. Ah, but my eyes have been opened to how tacky the whole planet can be. This site is jammed with the worst postcards humanity has to offer. I've printed a few out and I'll be using them on my next vacation in case the local scene doesn't offer the really bad goods.
We're on a roll
Bell-bottoms, sideburns, pet rocks . . . how stupid are we? Clearly quite stupid if this site is to believed. Perhaps it is a side effect of being a few branches up the evolutionary tree from sheep that would cause us, en masse, to yell "10-4, Good Buddy!" into a microphone. When you visit this site in five years, I have a feeling that Furbies, cell phones, SUVs and laptop computers will be on this list.