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Site Seeing

Holidays? Again?


© St. Petersburg Times, published October 12, 1998

Oh boy! It's my favorite time of the year! The lead up to the holidays. I don't actually like the holidays, but I derive immense pleasure from mewing about how people who put up Christmas decorations in October should be locked in a closet with Ken Starr for a few hours. At least it keeps me off the streets.


Fistfighting doesn't do that much for me, but a mental rumble makes my brain positively sparkle. So you can imagine my delight at finding a site that does nothing but savage the bane of surfers everywhere: banner ads. Add to the fact that these are advertising bigwigs giving each other's work a fearful ripping and you've got a recipe to make me very happy. Now all we need is a real-time site that shows strict nuns rapping the knuckles of copy editors who dare to change my stories. Then I can shuffle off this mortal coil with a huge grin on my face


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I have reached Nerdvana. It has been a long time coming, but with this awesome tool I am now able to track the position of every piece of satellite hardware circling this planet. Why anyone would want to do this is, of course, anybody's guess. This very nifty, real-time Java applet comes care of your chums at NASA.


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Death to Clippy! Well, not death exactly but more a state of extended de-animation. If you have been unfortunate enough to install even parts of Microsoft's Office 98 suite, you will have dealt with Clippy, the uber-annoying assistant that tries and most often fails to help you when you're flailing around. This page at the usually dry ZDnet must have made it through the humorless editorial department when the chief laugh-squasher was at lunch or something. They must be feeling the heat from C/Net or something (www.cnet.com/).


While we're on the subject of mortality, there is nothing like a good rubberneck at the last will and testament of the rich and famous from the comfort of your own PC. Here you will find a contrast between the wills of the grossly rich and the not-so-rich from times gone by


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A very sound idea from Adobe: a tool that will help non-programers do smart Javascript things to their Web sites. And it's available in both Windows and Mac flavors, which is refreshing. When a software product like ImageStyler goes into a prerelease form, it is often referred to as a beta. That means the software company wants you to do real work with it but doesn't want you to moan if it eats all said work. Double standards that would make a politician proud. Hey, at least it's free until the end of October and it has yet to eat anything of mine.

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